More and more families have computers in their homes, and children spend a great deal of their time using their home computers. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation and give your own opinion

#families #computers #homes #children #time #home #situation

In the contemporary era, the rise of

computers

in households has led to

children

spending a considerable amount of time using these devices.

This

essay will explore the benefits and drawbacks of

this

phenomenon.

Moreover

, I believe that the trend has more negative effects than advantages. On one hand, home

computers

provide

children

with access to a vast array of educational resources. They can use educational software, access online courses, and research information for their school projects, which can enhance their learning and academic performance.

Furthermore

computers

offer opportunities for

children

to develop important skills

such

as typing, digital literacy, and critical thinking, which are essential in the modern world.

On the other hand

, there are several notable drawbacks to

this

trend.

Firstly

, excessive use of

computers

can lead to health issues

such

as eye strain, poor posture, and a sedentary lifestyle, which can contribute to obesity and related health problems.

Additionally

, spending too much time on

computers

can negatively impact

children

's social skills and relationships. They may become isolated and less engaged with family and friends, preferring virtual interactions over real-life ones.

This

can hinder their ability to develop effective communication and interpersonal skills.

Moreover

, the content

children

access online is not always appropriate or safe. Without proper supervision, they might be exposed to harmful material or online predators, posing significant risks to their well-being. For the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that

while

home

computers

offer valuable educational benefits, the potential drawbacks are more concerning. It is crucial for parents to monitor and regulate their

children

's computer usage to ensure that

children

reap the benefits of technology without suffering its adverse effects.

Submitted by zora840810 on Mon Jun 10 2024

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task achievement

To further enhance the task response, ensure the inclusion of more specific examples or case studies to support the points made.

coherence cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, consider using varied transition words and phrases to create an even smoother flow between sentences and paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

The essay provides a well-structured argument with a clear introduction and conclusion.

coherence cohesion

The main points are supported with logical reasoning and are well-developed.

task achievement

The response effectively addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the given topic, showcasing a balanced perspective.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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More and more families have computers in their homes, and children spend a great deal of their time using their home computers. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation and give your own opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that a lot of research is a waste of time and money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

In some countries, owning a home is more important rather than renting one. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people think that too much money has been spent looking after and repairing old buildings, so we should knock down old buildings and build modern ones instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the responsibility is with the government to control the rise in obesity in children, others think the parents are the cause. Discuss both views and give your opinion.