The maintenance of public libraries is a waste of Money because of computer Technologies that have the same function.
Computer technologies,
such
as internet
, have limitless opportunities for numerous things, Correct article usage
the internet
for instance
, research
about any subject but it is not trustable in every case. In addition
, public libraries
are place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
which
everyone can access any knowledge, Correct word choice
where
besides
spending quality time
. It is argued that spend
money Wrong verb form
spending
for
public Change preposition
on
libraries
is totally unnecessary while
technological vehicles have same
function. I certainly disagree with Change the article
the same
this
statement.
On the one hand, people
who have a technological device can easily access any information which they are curious about, via internet
in a few seconds. In terms of books, obviously Correct article usage
the internet
take
more Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
time
to get information compared to looking up on the internet
. In
the opposite Change preposition
On
this
facility of internet
, Correct article usage
the internet
it
includes Correct pronoun usage
apply
significantly
high percentage of misinformation. Add an article
a significantly
However
, it is the fact that it is definitely worth the time
spent to get the right information. According to
most
recent Correct article usage
the most
research
from Oxford University, 65 per cent of data on the internet
does not affect reality and aims to deceive people
who conduct investigations into something.
On the other hand
, public libraries
not
Add a missing verb
are not
only
Correct article usage
the only
a
Correct article usage
apply
place
where Fix the agreement mistake
places
people
do some research
. In addition
that
, it Correct pronoun usage
apply
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
also
present
numerous zones for studying to Replace the word
presents
people
who want to socialise each
other and spend quality Change preposition
with each
time
via books. For instance
, it has been proved by scientists that studying with group
in a public place Add an article
the group
a group
encourage
Correct subject-verb agreement
encourages
to
Change preposition
apply
people
to study more effectively.
To conclude
, although
surfing on the internet
really easy way to research
it
occurs Correct pronoun usage
apply
Correct article usage
a noticeably
noticeably
amount of misinformation even Change the word
noticeable
it
has the same function Correct word choice
though it
with
books. Change preposition
as
Nevertheless
, libraries
give opportunities to people
who want to socialise and study at the same time
.Submitted by svdnruslu on
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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, mention specific public library programs or services that cannot be duplicated by computer technologies.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow between sentences. Sometimes the transition between points is abrupt and could be made smoother for better coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and a strong conclusion, which ties everything together nicely.
task achievement
You have provided a balanced argument, discussing both the advantages of computer technologies and the unique benefits of public libraries.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...