Many people say that globalization and the growing number of multinational companies have a negative effect on the environment. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.
In these
days, the proliferation of globalization and the rising trend of international Change preposition
These
organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
poses
a negative effect Correct subject-verb agreement
pose
to
the Change preposition
on
environment
. While
,
a section of society strongly advocates Remove the comma
apply
this
, others are oppose
to it. Change the verb form
are opposed
However
, I completely agree with the statement as this
phenomenon causes environment
Replace the word
environmental
pollution
and deforestation.
To begin
with, the
globalization leads to Industrial expansions, resulting in increased Correct article usage
apply
pollution
and carbon emissions. The huge factories and Industrial plants release their residue into the environment
and that leads to air pollution
and water pollution
. Likewise
, the emission of toxic gases by the factories prone
to numerous severe diseases like breathing issues through inhaling. To cite an example, India's capital city Add a missing verb
is prone
in
Delhi has recorded Change preposition
apply
tremendous
amount of toxic gases in the air by the World Health Organization, Add an article
a tremendous
that
are beyond human body tolerance. Correct pronoun usage
which
Therefore
, they clearly warned public
to avoid Correct article usage
the public
traveling
in Change the spelling
travelling
this
city.
Secondly
, the reproduction and supply chain practices of multinational companies contribute to the
deforestation and loss of biodiversity. Correct article usage
apply
In other words
,the utilization of green space by many international organizations in different countries is a veiled threat for
animal species and their habitats. Change preposition
to
For example
, every year thousands of trees are being cutting
down by the authorities in the Amazon rainforest for making paper and buildings without concerning how vital is the Amazon forest for the Change the verb form
are being cut
environment
. As a result
Add a comma
,
at
the verge of extinction.
In conclusion, Change preposition
on
although
industrialization and globalization has
countless benefits Change the verb form
have
to
society, Change preposition
for
however
, it's negative impact on the environment
cannot be ignored. As long as multinational companies focus on growing instead
of concerning environmental problems, it will lead to more detrimental impacts.Submitted by rajwants.1997 on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task by addressing both the effects of globalization and multinational companies on the environment. However, it would be beneficial to balance your arguments by considering potential counterarguments or any positive aspects of globalization, even if briefly.
task achievement
Your ideas are generally clear, but some sentences can be made more concise to avoid repetition and improve clarity. For example, the second sentence in the introduction could be simplified for better readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. To improve the logical flow, try to vary your sentence structure and use more transitional words and phrases. This will help in making your arguments more cohesive and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
You have used relevant examples to support your main points, which strengthens your argument. Ensure that all your examples are directly tied back to the main topic and are presented in a clear and concise manner.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a well-structured introduction and conclusion, providing a clear overview of your viewpoint and summarizing your key points effectively.
supported main points
You've used specific and relevant examples to support your arguments, such as the citation of India's air pollution and deforestation in the Amazon rainforest. These examples add credibility to your points.