Task one the two pie charts show the patron of expenditure in US between 1966-1996. Summarise the information by selecting the reporting and main feature and making comparisons where relevant

Task one the two pie charts show the patron of expenditure in US between 1966-1996. Summarise the information by selecting the reporting and main feature and making comparisons where relevant
These two charts show the patron of expenditure in
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
between 1966 and 1996. It shows us how much has changed in the US between 30
years
, and how the public's needs and wants evolve over
time
,
thus
chausing
Correct your spelling
causing
the expenditure in the US to
also
change
overall
.
Although
, even after some
time
, some things just still remain the same. In 30
years
, a lot has changed
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
the expenditure of the US. The most notable difference is the main importance of the US. Back
then
,
Food
was much more prioritized, with a whopping 44% used on
Food
.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
since
then
, the importance of
Food
has decreased drastically to 14%, with Cars being the top currently at 45%. Cars increased by 22% over
time
in 30
years
.
Suprisingly
Correct your spelling
Surprisingly
,
petrols
Change the wording
petrol
kinds of petrol
cans of petrol
gallons of petrol
show examples
remained the exact same
depite
Correct your spelling
despite
the huge increase in Cars. Restaurants
instead
doubled over 30
years
, despite
Food
having a decrease in prioritization over
time
. Furniture barely had a change,
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
show examples
we can see how the digital and online world of the Internet started to gain popularity, with a huge rise of 9%. Books were no longer needed, dropping to just 1%, similar to how computers were back
then
. In conclusion, through these
charts
Add a comma
charts,
show examples
we can see how transport and technologies became popular and on the rise, compared to Books and
Food
which people cared much more about back
then
.
Although
this
might seem bad,
Food
still remains the 2nd most popular as it is a basic need for everyone in the world, with restaurants still increasing despite the 30
years
.
Submitted by lydiaia on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 83%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words years, time, food with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "remain" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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