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Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #parents #children #members #society #school #place
Young children are the base of our future generation, both
parents
 and tutors play a vital role
moulding
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in moulding
show examples
 their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 which helps nurture
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
responsible
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
. Most people believe that
parents
 or guardians teach moral
values
 to make their kids wonderful human beings in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
,
while
 others believe that educational institutions and teachers are more responsible. On a personal note, I agree
both
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with both
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
show examples
 equally in the following passage I will discuss my opinion with supportive points. To commence with, some people have a strong
believe
Replace the word
belief
show examples
 that
parents
 should teach good moral
values
 to their kids which helps develop an understanding
individual
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of individual
show examples
, some routine habits and
activities
 will help them realize the value of good human beings,
Such
 as loving, caring, counselling, create a comfortable environment. These kinds of surroundings and daily
routine
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routines
show examples
 can help to create
a huge positive vibes
Correct the article-noun agreement
huge positive vibes
a huge positive vibe
show examples
 within themselves and will
also
 help them handle all situations wisely,
hence
 making them more mature in nature.
For instance
, positive and motivational things make children
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
share their emotional feelings and discomfort with their
closed
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close
show examples
 ones. They can realize the importance of good personality, behaviour and character that can lead to success in their life, both personally
as well as
 professionally.
On the other hand
,
Educator
Fix the agreement mistake
educators
show examples
 and Educational institutions are really crucial towards bringing up good members
in
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of
show examples
 our
society
. The curriculum and educational
activities
 can teach their pupils important ethical and social
values
 with reference
from
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to
show examples
 various subjects that are taught in school.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
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 history subject can help us explain and understand
about
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apply
show examples
our ancestors and their lifestyles and struggles. In
science
Add a comma
science,
show examples
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
show examples
 learn the global climate changes and impact of the human
activities
. These subjects
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
 students understand the
real time
Add a hyphen
real-time
show examples
 issues happening in
society
thus
 helping them act
accordingly
.
To conclude
, Educators and Educational institutions should teach young children how to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
 through curriculum and learning
activities
. At the same time,
parents
 should take initiative towards creating an adorable environment at home which helps one develop awareness towards their responsibility and social
values
.
Submitted by rathan6886 on

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task achievement
While the essay covers both perspectives, ensure to elaborate more balanced examples from both points of view. More specific examples make your argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
Work on smoother transition phrases between paragraphs and ideas. This will enhance the logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
Double-check for minor grammatical and lexical errors. Polishing these can elevate your overall presentation.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly establishes the topic and presents a balanced view on the debate.
coherence cohesion
Clear conclusion that reiterates your main point, providing a good summary.
coherence cohesion
Good organization within paragraphs allowing for coherent reading and understanding.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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