Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

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Certainly,
everyone
Replace the word
every one
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of us shoulders a massive responsibility towards
their
Correct pronoun usage
our
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health
Use synonyms
retention.
Health
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is like a crown on our head,
because
Correct word choice
and because
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of
this
Linking Words
, we must prioritize avoiding hazardous ingredients. Obviously,
a
Correct article usage
apply
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junk
food
Use synonyms
and soft
drinks
Use synonyms
are the most dangerous sources
for
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of
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these detrimental components. So, have you ever been thinking
how
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about how
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can we solve
this
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utmost problem? Reducing the white poison-which means
sugar-from
Correct your spelling
sugar from
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our diet is by no means an easy task. So, I completely agree with raising the money
of
Change preposition
for
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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junk
food
Use synonyms
to seek less sugar. In terms of using
a fast
Remove the article
fast food
a portion of fast food
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food
Use synonyms
, we must take a close look
to
Change preposition
at
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the pros and the true
color
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colour
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of it. On the one hand, it
services
Verb problem
provides
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you
lots
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with lots
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of diseases on a silver plate.
Firstly
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; manufactured
food
Use synonyms
is the main source for putting on weight, and the reason behind the scene is the accumulation of fats and lipids in various
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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of
physique
Add an article
the physique
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.
Secondly
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; diabetes starts to crosscheck the way to your body, and there is no doubt that
this
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kind of
food
Use synonyms
is the best environment for it to be created.
Linking Words
Lastly
Change the word
Last
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but not least; by increasing the amount of
Use synonyms
food-which
Correct your spelling
food- which
is not handmade- you eat, the indicator for
existing
Replace the word
the existence
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of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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cholesterol in your body will go up,
that is
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why the relationship between cholesterol in our blood vessels and eating
an
Correct article usage
apply
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outdoors
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outdoor
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food
Use synonyms
is directly proportional. We must take a serious step to get the solution of sugar reduction from our
food
Use synonyms
. It is preferable that the money costs of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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junk
food
Use synonyms
would not be cheap at all, absolutely, it is an immense step towards a well-being body, physical, and mental
health
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
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, soft
drinks
Use synonyms
are another source of poison flow in our physique. The danger resulting from getting fizzy
drinks
Use synonyms
is represented by osteoporosis.
In addition
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to osteoporosis,
the
Change the article
apply
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diabetes
as a result
Linking Words
of drinkable
products
Use synonyms
is highly ranked by many scientists. In regards to
Use synonyms
drinks
Change the noun form
drink
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hazards, we cannot ignore its effective role in destroying the inner wall of the stomach.
Moreover
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, their direct contact with
stomach
Correct article usage
the stomach
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may lead to
ulcer
Fix the agreement mistake
ulcers
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. Intimately ,there are many harmful causes directed by these kinds of
products
Use synonyms
, particularly, their role in harming the skin, nails, and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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hairs
Fix the agreement mistake
hair
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badly
Rephrase
apply
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. So generally speaking, it is advisable to prevent the drink
products
Use synonyms
by imposing taxes on them.
In addition
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to taxes, making their prices cannot be affordable may be another way of solving the problem.
To conclude
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, summarize, and end up my criticism effectively,
health
Use synonyms
is
the
Correct article usage
apply
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God's faithfulness for us, so we should put ourselves on the right track to keep it, and the first serious step on
this
Linking Words
track is to avoid
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
manufactured
food
Use synonyms
and drink
products
Use synonyms
.

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relevant specific examples
Include more specific examples to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more convincing.
logical structure
Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Connect your ideas more clearly to enhance the coherence of the essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Avoid repetition and ensure that each point you make is distinct and adds value to your argument.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion and outlines your stance on the issue.
complete response
You have clearly stated your agreement with the topic and have provided reasons and examples to support your viewpoint.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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