Some people think that one should plan detailed activities for their leisure time, while others disagree with this view. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #plan #activities #leisure #time

some people claim that they should have a

plan

for their

leisure

time

while

others disagree with

this

issue. I will discuss both views

as well as

my idea. first of all , I for one , prefer to have a

plan

for my free

time

furthermore

, the majority of people like to

plan

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their activities in their

leisure

time

. they have many

resion

Correct your spelling

reasons

for

this

idea ,

such

as preparing facilities ,

reserve

Wrong verb form

reserving

show examples

the hotel and

tell to

Wrong verb form

telling

show examples

their friends to go with them. I believe that when we have a

plan

, we will use our free

time

as well as

possible.

on the other hand

, some people think that

planing

Correct your spelling

planning

show examples

for

leisure

time

is not essential . since they like to go

Change preposition

show examples

holidays

Fix the agreement mistake

holiday

show examples

without any

planing

Correct your spelling

planning

show examples

. to illustrate they always provide necessary

thing

Fix the agreement mistake

things

show examples

and go through the nurture.

Hence

planing

Correct your spelling

planning

show examples

is not crucial and it is

waste

Correct article usage

a waste

show examples

time

moreover

, it may their idea would get

change

Add an article

a change

show examples

on the road. So , it is better that they decide at the moment.

To sum up

, there are many different ideas for planning activities in

leisure

time

for example

, better planning or vanish the

time

and as I said , I agree to have an

exceptionaly

Correct your spelling

exceptionally

good

plan

for our free

time

Submitted by rastaebrahimifar on Tue Jun 11 2024

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task achievement

To improve task response, ensure you fully address all parts of the task. Try to provide more balanced arguments and elaborate on the points with specific details or examples.

coherence cohesion

Enhance coherence by using a wider range of linking words and cohesive devices. This will help in connecting ideas more smoothly and logically.

coherence cohesion

Check for grammar and spelling errors. Improving accuracy will lead to clearer expression and better coherence.

task achievement

Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and you've addressed both sides of the argument.

coherence cohesion

The structure of your essay is logical, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task achievement

Your ideas are relevant to the topic and you have made an effort to support them.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

222 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

leisure time
detailed activities
making the most
variety of experiences
waste of time
over-scheduling
spontaneity
relaxation
increase stress
balanced approach
impromptu decisions

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Some people think that one should plan detailed activities for their leisure time, while others disagree with this view. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem ?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, there is a greater focus at all levels in education on science and business studies rather that the arts. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?