Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. Others think there are more effective methods. Dicuss both views and give your opinion.

#gym #methods #dicuss

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Nowadays, there is a growing interest in staying in shape and being physically active. Some

people

believe that enrolling in the

gym

is the best way to do so,

while

others believe that more effective ways are available to achieve these goals.

This

essay will discuss both views and explain why the

gym

one

of the most optimal options available. On the

one

hand, many

people

complain that when they sign up

Change preposition

for

show examples

the

gym

they do not attend

Change preposition

apply

show examples

classes

therefore

enrollement

Correct your spelling

enrollment

fees

goes

Change the verb form

show examples

to waste.

However

, I believe that in order to reach the best result

one

must be

commited

Correct your spelling

committed

to the

gym

In other words

, no results will be seen without commitment. The

gym

one

of the most significant places in which someone

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

keep up with new athletic trends and different kinds of

excercises

Correct your spelling

exercises

that are suitable for everyone including a variety of

excercises

Correct your spelling

exercises

such

as; aerobics, gymnastics,

zumba

Change the capitalization

Zumba

show examples

, spinning, pilates, strength training and weight lifting.

Therefore

, an individual can opt for the type of physical training based on their preferences.

For instance

, aerobic

excercises

Correct your spelling

exercises

are most beneficial for those who like to follow the orders of a physical instructor.

While

Correct word choice

People

show examples

people

who require cardio

excercises

Correct your spelling

exercises

will most certainly choose

zumba

Change the capitalization

Zumba

show examples

On the other hand

, other

excercises

Correct your spelling

exercises

that do not require signing up to the

gym

usually lack

excercise

Correct your spelling

exercise

guidance ,which is accessible at the

gym

;

motivate

Correct subject-verb agreement

motivates

show examples

most

people

to stay

comitted

Correct your spelling

committed

, teaches them resilience, and

enable

Correct subject-verb agreement

enables

show examples

them to be more flexible toward accepting their mistakes to perfect their

teqnique

Correct your spelling

technique

while

excercising

Correct your spelling

exercising

Moreover

, it could be dangerous not having a coach to correct forms and positions of

excercising

Correct your spelling

exercising

For instance

, a study that was conducted by

University

Correct article usage

the University

show examples

of Toronto showed that there was an increase in sports injuries in

prople

Correct your spelling

people

who attempted other sports activities outside the

gym

. Another case report showed severe scalp trauma in an individual who climbed a mountain without following safety protocols. In conclusion,

signinng-up

Correct your spelling

signing up

in the

gym

is the safest, best way to stay in shape as they offer a

wide-range

Correct your spelling

wide range

show examples

of choices. Trying out different kinds of

excercises

Correct your spelling

exercises

without the direct

suppervision

Correct your spelling

supervision

present in the

gym

is recommended.

Submitted by alamer_ma on Wed Jun 12 2024

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General

Consider strengthening the supporting arguments with more concrete examples or evidence. Additionally, some grammatical errors and repetitive phrases could be refined.

Grammatical Accuracy

There were a few minor grammatical errors such as 'enrollment fees goes to waste' which should be 'enrollment fees go to waste' and 'different kinds of excercises' which should be 'different kinds of exercises'. Proofreading will help catch such errors.

Coherence and Cohesion

Improving coherence between paragraphs could be achieved by more clearly linking back to the essay's main argument in each paragraph. This will help to maintain a more coherent flow of ideas.

Task Response

The essay successfully presents and explains both sides of the argument. The introduction and conclusion are strong and clearly outline the writer’s opinion.

Lexical Resource

The range of vocabulary is appropriate and varied, showing a good command of language.

Coherence and Cohesion

The logical structure of ideas and paragraphs is well-organized, making the essay easy to follow.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

360 words

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Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. Others think there are more effective methods. Dicuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree?

Drug abuse is an increasing problem in modern times. Discuss some reasons behind this and suggest ways it can be hindered.

An international company is offering a temporary job for work experience, write a letter to apply for that job. You need to explain where did you find this information why you want to apply this job what qualification you have what position you want to apply

Some people believe that environmental issues should be the first priority of humanity in the 21st century. To what extent do you agree with the view expressed?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?