Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
With an ever-increasing concern about how to handle the boundaries between free will and guidance on
children
, some individuals have opined that free-time
activities
for children
should be guided by parents
. The rest of the population, however
, argues that children
should do what they want in their free time
. This
essay will, therefore
, evaluate both arguments and present a concluding viewpoint.
To begin
with, some individuals argue that parents
should organize free time
activities
for children
. From the perspective of parents
, their children
are suffering from the lack of information and knowledge in acquiring safety in free time
activities
. Therefore
, they will actually be benefited
from following the guidance of Wrong verb form
benefit
parents
as it will equip them with an essential safe environment.
Furthermore
, compared to random groups of children
without the given trend, those children
with a rising freewill to choose and engage in free time
activities
have shown an increased tendency of being injured and decreased psychological satisfaction of parents
.
In spite of those reasons mentioned above, other oppositions contend that children
should play with their free will in their free time
. Providing a few agreements on previous arguments, moving to educational instructors can illuminate a different perspective. The priority of them is to maximize the inner potential of students and teach active learning attitudes for their future and this
consequently
demonstrates that children
require the opportunities to make choices with their free will and the necessity to overcome passive learning attitudes. Thus
, making decisions about considering about
boundaries for Change preposition
apply
children
should not be based on the sole side of parents
. Moreover
, there must be other factors to be weighed in appreciating the actual causal relationship between the free will of children
and free time
activities
.
In conclusion, some individuals argue that parents
should provide organized free time
activities
for children
. Nevertheless
, I firmly believe that making decisions in boundaries of free
will of Add an article
the free
children
more achievable will require more consideration and thus
most relevant parties in society should be entirely involved for more sustainable advantages.Submitted by rachael0124 on
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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. This can help to illustrate your points more clearly and make your essay more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences are quite complex and can be simplified for better understanding. Aim to express ideas more clearly and directly.
coherence cohesion
Make sure all points are fully developed and supported. Some arguments are a bit vague and could benefit from further explanation.
coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.
task achievement
You have provided a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument.
task achievement
Your language use is generally good, with appropriate vocabulary and sentence structure.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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