Now a days, many people have to work longer hours, and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can employers do to make their employees' lives easier?
these days, the
lonnger
period you spend Correct your spelling
longer
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
in
Change preposition
at
work
Use synonyms
become
routine for most Wrong verb form
becomes
of
Change preposition
apply
people
and for that Add an article
the people
Correct your spelling
reason
reasone
the Add a comma
reasone,
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
feel
stressed out, more Correct subject-verb agreement
feels
anxiouse
andCorrect your spelling
anxious
a
lot of other Add a missing verb
have a
psycological
and Correct your spelling
psychological
physyological
problems. but what the Correct your spelling
psychological
employes
can do to Correct your spelling
employees
relive
Correct your spelling
relieve
this
kind of stress and make Linking Words
there
lives Correct your spelling
their
more easy
?
in terms, Replace the words
easier
the
life become more complex than before so Correct article usage
apply
the
jobs these days Correct article usage
apply
not
like in past Add a missing verb
are not
due to
the Linking Words
worker
in Fix the agreement mistake
workers
contiouse
Correct your spelling
constant
competetion
with Correct your spelling
competition
other
the Fix the agreement mistake
others
majoraty
of them working harder and Correct your spelling
majority
some times
post the working hours. Correct your spelling
sometimes
Linking Words
also
the Add a comma
also,
employes
Correct your spelling
employees
them self they
can not Correct your spelling
themself
themselves
finishe
Correct your spelling
finish
finished
there
Correct your spelling
their
work
during Use synonyms
the
working hours so they need to Correct article usage
apply
work
after Use synonyms
the
working hours or even during the weekend. in my opinion Correct article usage
apply
due to
life changes Linking Words
as well as
the jobs.
Linking Words
on the other hand
, the worker Linking Words
have
many options to make their Change the verb form
has
live
become comfortable and easier as much as they can. Replace the word
lives
for
Linking Words
example
they can Add a comma
example,
work
in a team so the Use synonyms
responsability
will be divided equally between them, they must know how to do time Correct your spelling
responsibility
managment
, ask for help if Correct your spelling
management
need it
and make Wrong verb form
needed
Add an article
a plane
the plane
plane
for Correct your spelling
plans
everytings
. the people can spend time with Correct your spelling
everything
there
family, go out with friends , Replace the word
their
do
some Correct word choice
and do
rellaxing stratiges
( spa day, massage and yoga).
Correct your spelling
relaxing strategies
to sum up
Linking Words
the
life become Correct article usage
apply
defriente
than before Correct word choice
more different
bu
the person can Correct your spelling
but
deciside
Correct your spelling
decide
to
be Correct word choice
whether to
in stress
or Change preposition
stressed
no
if he Correct your spelling
not
know
how to Change the verb form
knows
do
stress managment and to Verb problem
manage
controle everythings
in Correct your spelling
control everything
good
way.Change the article
a good
Submitted by llaora on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Grammar
Work on improving sentence structure and grammar to increase clarity. Simple errors like 'the lonnger period you spend it in work' should be 'the longer hours spent at work'.
Development
Develop your arguments further with clear examples and evidence. For instance, explain more about how jobs have changed and why this leads to more stress.
Logical flow
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus and that ideas are logically connected. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs can help improve coherence.
Conclusion
Conclude your essay with a strong summary that ties all your main points together. Your conclusion is somewhat weak and doesn’t effectively summarize the discussion.
Question addressed
You addressed the question by discussing both causes of work-related stress and potential solutions employers can implement.
Suggestions provided
You provided some valid suggestions for reducing stress, such as working in teams and time management.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.