The chart below shows the number of men and women in future education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full -time or part- time.

#men #women #future #education #britain #three #periods #-time #part- #time

The bar chart represents the number of

men

and

women

infuture

Correct your spelling

in future

education

in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying

full

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

time

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

for the respective

year

. I will explain about

this

in the following paragraphs.

Overall

, in 1990 -91 more females started their

education

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

and it was nearer to 1200. In 1970 -71 within 10 years males

also

started their

education

part

time

Firstly

,people

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

Change the article

the

show examples

option to choose their

education

full

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

time

and

Correct word choice

show examples

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

. Most of the

men

and

women

started to choose their

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

eduction

Correct your spelling

education

show examples

. In the

year

1970-71, within 10 years thousands of

mens

Correct your spelling

men

show examples

choose their

education

part

time

whereas

1990

Change preposition

in 1990

show examples

-91 , around 1200

womens

Correct your spelling

women

show examples

choose their

education

part

time

Full

Add a hyphen

Full-time

show examples

time

education

are

Change the verb form

show examples

less compared to

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

education

.In the

year

1970-

Add a comma

71,

show examples

both

men

and

women

are in less in

full

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

time

education

. In the

year

Fix the agreement mistake

years

show examples

1980-

Add a comma

81,

show examples

both

men

Change noun form

men's

show examples

amd

Correct your spelling

and

women

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

education

where

Correct your spelling

were

show examples

reduced.In the

year

1990-

Add a comma

91,

show examples

there was a slight increase in

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

education

.In the

year

Fix the agreement mistake

years

show examples

1970-71

womens

Correct your spelling

women's

women

part

time

Correct your spelling

part-time

show examples

education

was less and in the

year

Fix the agreement mistake

years

show examples

1990-91 it

rosed

Correct your spelling

rose

show examples

To conclude

, both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

men

and

women

are interested in pursuing their

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

education

Submitted by insighttribez on Wed Jun 12 2024

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 83%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, education, time, part, year with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

208 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The chart below shows the number of men and women in future education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full -time or part- time.

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion. You should write at least 250 words.

Some people think that good health is very important to every person, so medical services should not be run by profit-making companies. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In major cities around the world, traffic congestion has become a serious problem. How can this problem be tackled? Give reasons and examples from your own experience.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situation. Discuss both views and give your opinion.