Computers have become so advanced and interactive that students in the future will have no need for a human educator in the classroom. Do you agree? Why or why not? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.
Nowadays, people feel that technology will substitute human teachers’ positions in the future because it is very
well developed
and communal with learners in the classroom. Add a hyphen
well-developed
However
, I disagree with this
assumption. The two reasons are person
educators help them mature and get ready to be good workers for industry.
The responsibilities of teachers are not only delivering the knowledge to studentsReplace the word
personal
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
supporting their growth as a human being. School is a small society where people with many different characters are in the classroom. Therefore
, new relationships have been built up through interplaying while
learning and playing time each
other. When there is conflict among students, human educators can be Change preposition
with each
a
good Correct article usage
apply
model
as Fix the agreement mistake
models
an
Correct article usage
apply
adult
for premature ones Fix the agreement mistake
adults
while
helping them how to
reconcile after struggling.
Another important role of human Verb problem
apply
instructor
is cooperating with parents and Fix the agreement mistake
instructors
local
community. Add an article
the local
Computer
can be utilized for searching some information regarding their topics, playing educational games, and learning their planned subject. Fix the agreement mistake
Computers
However
, Individual educators use computers as equipment for learning
process. Add an article
the learning
Also
, they are co-creative with parents and the local community by knowing student’s strengths and support
them Wrong verb form
supporting
for
holistic development for job preparation in the real world.
As I mentioned above, even though computers are essential in the learning process for students, the role of human teachers Change preposition
in
such
as assisting for
human Change preposition
apply
being
and Fix the agreement mistake
beings
collaboration
for future careers cannot be replaced by computers in Replace the word
collaborating
school
room.Add an article
the school
a school
Submitted by sby0703 on
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task achievement
You have addressed the main points of the prompt, but the examples could be more specific and detailed. Try to relate them more directly to your arguments.
task achievement
The essay would benefit from more diverse vocabulary and more complex sentence structures. This will make your arguments more compelling and enhance clarity.
coherence cohesion
Organizing your ideas into more distinct paragraphs would improve readability. Always aim for clear topic sentences at the start of each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all your main points are consistently supported by relevant specific examples. For example, providing a real-world scenario or research finding would strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your discussion.
task achievement
You have successfully identified and discussed multiple roles that human teachers have which computers cannot fulfill.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.