You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Some people believe that having a job you enjoy is more important than earning a high salary. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#minutes #topic #people #job #salary

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There are some people who believe that having a

job

Use synonyms

that you enjoy is more important than that of earning a high

salary

Use synonyms

. I do not completely agree

Change preposition

with

show examples

this

Linking Words

because I feel that earning a high

salary

Use synonyms

is commonly desired by everyone as it not only gives a lot of motivation to operate but

also

Linking Words

helps to fulfil our financial needs.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss why I believe

high

Correct article usage

a high

show examples

salary

Use synonyms

is as important as being able to enjoy a

job

Use synonyms

. The primary reason is that

salary

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is the key to some motivation at

work

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. You cannot enjoy a

job

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if you are not well paid.

Moreover

Linking Words

, if you do not get paid

that

Correct word choice

what

show examples

you deserve, you will not be happy

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which

Correct word choice

and

show examples

you will not feel dedicated and determined to give your cent

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

in your assignments.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, a survey suggests that

salary

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is the main reason, 80% of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

working class

Add a hyphen

working-class

show examples

people leave their jobs.

For example

Linking Words

, an employee was always given a lot of presentations to

work

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on because she enjoyed making and presenting them but she was not rewarded for the same.

Additionally

Linking Words

, earning a sufficient

salary

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is important because it fulfils the financial needs of a person. With the increase in the daily living expenses and the situation of the financial economy,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

wages play an important role in one's life because it should be able to pay for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

schools, food, clothing,

shelter

Correct word choice

and shelter

show examples

and

also

Linking Words

help to contribute to the savings for the family.

For instance

Linking Words

, a person earns 2000$ at

work

Use synonyms

but his monthly expense is 2500$ and he deserves 4000$ for the

work

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he does. He loves his

job

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but being underpaid is not going to keep him happy and

hence

Linking Words

he will not be able to enjoy his

job

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. In conclusion, I do not completely agree that enjoying a

job

Use synonyms

is more important than earning a high

salary

Use synonyms

as it does not

work

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practically because people have a lot of bills to pay.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, I believe enjoying the

job

Use synonyms

is as important as earning a deserving

salary

Use synonyms

Submitted by ruchishah0 on Thu Jun 13 2024

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task achievement

The essay tends to repeat certain ideas, leading to redundancy. Try to present a wider variety of points that support your argument to avoid this.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Using more transitional phrases can help guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.

task achievement

You provide a well-rounded conclusion that revisits and summarizes your main points effectively.

coherence cohesion

The introduction provides a clear thesis statement that outlines your stance on the issue.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

346 words

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