Some people believe that school education should be focused on academic subjects, which are good for childiren's future, and subjects like music and sports are useless. In my opinion, subjects such as music and sports are useful and effictive for spirtual and physical development for children.
Some people believe that school education should be focused on academic subjects, which are good for
childiren's
Correct your spelling
children's
future, and subjects like music and sports are useless.
Body paragraph 1
In my opinion, subjects
such
Linking Words
as music and sports are useful and
effictive
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effective
for
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the spirtual
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spirtual
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spiritual
and physical development
for
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of
show examples
children.
Body paragraph 2
I believe that the reason why most weddings are expensive
that
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is that
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nowadays people spend a lot of money to make the wedding luxurious and plush.
Body paragraph 3
In my opinion,
this
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definitely
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is definitely
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negative
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a negative
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event, because
such
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weddings lead
extravagance
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to extravagance
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.Weddings should made smaller that allow extravagance.
Body paragraph 4
Problems
such
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environmental
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as environmental
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pollution and climate change affect all people in the world equally.
Although
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the government
take
Wrong verb form
has made
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several decisions against
environment
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environmental
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pollution,
results
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the results
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are ineffective.In my opinion, more effective plant trees prevent pollution.
Conclusion
In
sime
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some
countries,
number
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the number
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parents
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of parents
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who prefer home education for their children increased.
Although
Linking Words
homeschooling
some
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has some
show examples
advantages for me more
effectuve
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effective
for children
learn
Fix the infinitive
to learn
show examples
at school.
soglomovsarvar
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea and expands it fully. This will help in maintaining a logical structure for your essay.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph flows from one to the next. Use transitional words and phrases to help guide the reader through your essay.
coherence cohesion
Introduce and conclude your essay properly. The introduction should give an overview of the topic, and the conclusion should summarize your main points.
task achievement
Work on expanding your ideas with clear, relevant examples and details. Support your opinions with logical arguments.
task achievement
Make sure your ideas are clearly presented and easy to follow. Avoid jumping from one idea to another without proper connections.
task achievement
Include specific examples to support your viewpoints. This will make your arguments more compelling and robust.
task achievement
You have discussed multiple viewpoints, which shows an understanding of the topic's complexity.
task achievement
You have shown that subjects like music and sports are beneficial for children's development.
task achievement
You have attempted to provide reasons and offer your opinion on various issues, which is a good start.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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