Countries with a long average working day are likely to be more economically successful than other countries, but many suffer from some negative social consequences as a result. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Presently, the issue of
labor
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labour
show examples
utilization and working
time
has garnered
a
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apply
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significant attention among economists and businessmen. Some people believe that countries with longer
time
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
used for working are expected to be more
succeed
Replace the word
successful
show examples
in economic than others but they
also
face potential negative social consequences. From my perspective, I do not fully agree with
this
viewpoint.
Although
it is asserted globally that working hours
has
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have
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a strong connection with productivity, requiring employees
increase
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to increase
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their
time
of work does not guarantee economic development.
This
is because overworked
worker
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workers
show examples
often experience
tired
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tiredness
show examples
and stress, leading to instances of miscalculating data.
As a result
, it can bring about financial losses for companies and, in the long run, hinder the progress of entire industries. We need to
more
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be more
show examples
cautious about the increasing
of
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apply
show examples
social
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
.
For instance
, if more people have overtime working, they are compelled to sacrifice valuable
time
with their family, especially their children.
Consequently
,
this
can lead to social isolation among young individuals
due to
insufficient parental care, potentially contributing to increased rates of autism or even youth crime. From the employees’ perspective, often experience overwork can pose a significant threat to their well-being,
result
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resulting
show examples
in depression or insomnia.
Consequently
, prolonged mental stress is likely to contribute
a
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to a
show examples
higher rate of suicide. In short, I firmly believe that
impose
Wrong verb form
imposing
show examples
longer working hours upon employees
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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not only
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
to economic failure but
also
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
rise to potential social issues in
health
Add an article
the health
show examples
of citizens.
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • correlation
  • GDP (Gross Domestic Product)
  • detrimental
  • stress levels
  • strain
  • work-life balance
  • emerging economies
  • unsustainable growth
  • social unrest
  • productivity tools
  • government policies
  • social well-being
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