Rich countries should not employ labour from poor countries because they need them more. Do you agree or disagree?

It is believed that rich
nations
should not employ
workers
from poorer ones as they are in greater need of them.
This
writer disagrees with the opinion because
this
action helps to release the financial weight and improve the knowledge of poor
countries
,
although
some argue that
this
will drain these
countries
’ human workforce. Central to the discussion point is that employment of
workers
from second-world
countries
can relieve their monetary stress. One should acknowledge that in these
countries
, their government has
limited
Correct article usage
a limited
show examples
budget to deal with financial issues. By sending some
workers
abroad to
work
for first-world
countries
, they will be able to spend less on them as employer
nations
have done
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
Therefore
, allowing richer
nations
to hire some of their poorer counterparts’ workforce can mitigate their monetary burdens.
However
, members of the public
rejects
Change the verb form
reject
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this
idea as they believe
this
will drain impoverished
countries
’ human labour.
This
is
due to
their prior observations, most young labourers who leave their country to
work
in richer ones never return to their homeland.
This
may be true, but
according to
exchange policies, they will be returned to their country
at the end
of their time noted in their
work
contract. For that reason, the workforce of these
nations
are
Change the verb form
is
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still maintained.
This
writer agrees that the action will benefit underdeveloped
countries
with knowledge. When
workers
are at
work
in richer
countries
, they will simultaneously learn innovative ideas from their environment.
At the end
of their
work
contract
due to
exchange regulations, they will come back to their country to give ideas to improve their hometown.
Thus
, sending people away as exchange
workers
can give the nation
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
more innovative ideas to develop. Taking all points into account,
although
underdeveloped
countries
can take the risk of brain drain, they can
also
release their financial burden and gain knowledge.
Hence
,
this
author approves of the action.
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introduction and conclusion
Strengthen your introduction by clearly stating both sides of the argument before presenting your stance. This helps the reader understand the context better.
logical structure
Work on smoother transitions between paragraphs to improve the flow of ideas. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.
relevant specific examples
Provide more specific and relevant examples to support your main points. This will make your argument more convincing and grounded in reality.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that all sentences within the paragraph consistently support that idea.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced view by acknowledging both sides of the argument before presenting the writer's stance.
supported main points
The main points are generally well-supported, showing a decent level of understanding and engagement with the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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