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Band 4

Some people say that to benefit the development of a child, the mother and father should take parenting classes. To what extent you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #benefit #development #child #mother #father #classes
It
is argue
Change the verb form
is argued
show examples
 that to advantages the growth of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
offspring, the influence of
parents
 is crucial. I completely agree with
this
 statement.
First
Add a comma
First,
show examples
off
Replace the word
of
show examples
 all, the effect of parenting can be useful for
child
Correct article usage
a child
show examples
, there are several
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
advantages which can enhance younger to be better and will have good manner.
in
Capitalize word
In
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term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
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 of manner, the most important ways to improve how a
child
 think is
become
Fix the infinitive
to become
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 example for them.
As a result
, it will be influenced by
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
show examples
 behaviour.
For Instance
,
parents
 who
has
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have
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 bad behaviour
Change preposition
toward
show examples
to
Change preposition
toward
show examples
 their
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
children,
this
 is will
be impact
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be impacted
show examples
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
Replace the word
actions
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act
Replace the word
actions
show examples
 as well.
Therefore
, teaching them
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 of
home
Add an article
the home
show examples
 is one of the best ways.
In addition
,
Correct article usage
the ingcreasing
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ingcreasing
Correct your spelling
increasing
 of a
child
 is considered by parenting classes can develop them in their field. because
only
Add an article
the only
an only
show examples
parent
Correct article usage
a parent
show examples
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
knows the ability of a
child
,
Therefore
, available
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time
 to teach their act and insight is vital, especially for a
childrens
Correct your spelling
child's
 ability, if
parents
 do not have
time
 to study with a
child
 it will get
bad
Add an article
the bad
a bad
show examples
 effect and can be worn for their
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
.
For example
, many
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
younger that they have a bad attitude because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
 is not
support
Correct word choice
supportive
show examples
such
 as, they never get a great education
by
Change preposition
from
show examples
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
show examples
acts
Verb problem
apply
show examples
.
Therefore
,
should
Correct pronoun usage
there should
show examples
 be awareness for
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 younger,
this
 is
that
Correct word choice
what
show examples
parents
 have to do for
well-being
Correct pronoun usage
their well-being
show examples
. In conclusion, teaching a
child
 when they still have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time
study
Fix the infinitive
to study
show examples
 with
a
Change the word
their
show examples
parents
 is
significant
Correct article usage
a significant
show examples
ways
Fix the agreement mistake
way
show examples
 to improve
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
. as
parents
. they should always have much
time
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 their
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
children.
Submitted by patricius.yohanes on

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task achievement
Work on sentence structure and grammar to ensure clarity and correctness. For example, 'it is argue that' should be 'it is argued that,' and 'offspring' should be replaced with 'child.'
coherence cohesion
Enhance coherence by using a variety of linking words and phrases. Avoid repetitive phrases and ensure smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and attempts to provide reasoning and examples to support the viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
There are clear attempts to structure the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • discipline techniques
  • conflict resolution
  • child development stages
  • parental confidence
  • unified approach
  • parenting roles
  • child-rearing
  • preventative measure
  • effective communication
  • common pitfalls
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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