Some people belive that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue tht it is better to try and improve such situations Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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It is a controversial argument that when people are faced with unpleasant conditions, it would be great if they accept it or make the decision to change it. In my opinion, it would be better to plan for a better situation and do our best. Sometimes acceptance of some bad conditions indeed helps us.

Due to

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the

lots of

Correct word choice

many

show examples

responsibilities that we have in our daily lives, it is not a perfect approach to leave them immediately.

For example

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, if some person has a family and he or she is responsible for providing their expenses, it would not be a good decision for him or her to lose the

job

Use synonyms

Additionally

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, I suppose that if individuals are not able to make changes in their current lives, it would be better to accept

this

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truth and keep living with calm and positive

feeling

Fix the agreement mistake

feelings

show examples

On the other hand

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, others believe that change is always a better choice to deal with an unsatisfied

job

Use synonyms

or conditions. If individuals have enough courage and motivation they can be able to overcome

Change preposition

apply

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these problems, quitting their

Use synonyms

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

and searching for new positions that are suitable for them. By doing it,

finally

Linking Words

, people can feel comfortable in their lives and be more happy. Things like promotion, better

job

Use synonyms

opportunities,

higher

Correct word choice

and higher

show examples

wages are the consequences of these changes. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

it is possible to deal with unsuitable situations and it might be a temporary solution, it would be better to have an approach to change the things that are not made for us.

ostorr7213Fri Jun 14 2024

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task achievement

Although your essay addresses both views and provides your opinion, adding more specific examples and elaborating on your points could strengthen your argument. For example, mentioning real-life scenarios or statistics can provide a deeper context for your ideas.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is generally coherent, but you could improve the logical structure by ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly from one idea to the next. Using clear connectors and signposting can help guide the reader through your argument more effectively.

coherence cohesion

While your introduction and conclusion are clear, try to ensure they are tightly linked. A concluding sentence that echoes the introduction can bring your essay full circle and give it a sense of closure.

task achievement

Your essay effectively covers both sides of the argument, which is essential for a balanced discussion. You've provided a clear stance on the issue as well.

coherence cohesion

The ideas presented are clear and logical, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument. This enhances the overall readability of your essay.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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Some people belive that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue tht it is better to try and improve such situations Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think that there are now too many cars on the roads, and that they are spoiling our towns and ciities. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, experience is more valued in the workplace than knowledge in many countries. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behavior. What is your opinion?

The development of tourism contributed to English becoming the most prominent language in the world. Some people think this will lead to English becoming the only language to be spoken globally. What are the advantages and disadvantages to having one language in the world?