Recent figures show an increase in violent crime among youngsters under the age of 18. Some psychologists claim that the basic reason for this is that children these days are not getting the social and emotional learning they need from parents and teachers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Point to the latest research crimes
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are harsh
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
increasing
between
Change preposition
among
show examples
teenagers who are under 18. A number of psychologists think
that is
the
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
show examples
fault or even
Correct article usage
the techers
show examples
techers
Correct your spelling
teachers
because of the
behavor
Correct your spelling
behaviour
they have with them. I strongly disagree with
this
statement and
that is
for the
sence
Correct your spelling
sense
of parents have with their
childreen
Correct your spelling
children
and the contract which
techears
Correct your spelling
teachers
sign when they being a teacher. Families like their
childreen
Correct your spelling
children
and
that
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
can not be correct they behave
unkind
Change the adjective
unkindly
show examples
with their babies. When a man and
women
Fix the agreement mistake
woman
show examples
become a father and mother some emotion and feal have been made
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their
heart
Fix the agreement mistake
hearts
show examples
like love and
this
fealing
Correct your spelling
feeling
show examples
forced
Wrong verb form
forces
show examples
them to be
kind
.
for example
, when a child
say
Change the verb form
says
show examples
to his or her mother I like being
doctor
Add an article
a doctor
show examples
the feeling that
mother
Correct article usage
the mother
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
is a
kind
of motivation because of the love she has. So
this
idea can not be
turue
Correct your spelling
true
the
behave
Replace the word
behaviour
show examples
of parents
to
Change preposition
towards
show examples
their
childreen
Correct your spelling
children
is a deal of doing crime. Teachers sign some contracts before they start
activity
Correct article usage
an activity
show examples
as a teacher
that is
being
kind
and some
limitaions
Correct your spelling
limitations
which are related to behaving with
childreen
Correct your spelling
children
such
as not
screming
Correct your spelling
screaming
,
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not shouting, being
kind
and
recpective
Correct your spelling
respective
receptive
.
This
limitation
have
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
made because of
childreen
Correct your spelling
children
right
Fix the agreement mistake
rights
show examples
in
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
society and everything is
controling
Correct your spelling
controlled
around the world nowadays.
This
statemant
Correct your spelling
statement
ca not
Correct your spelling
cannot
show examples
be right too because of the details that
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
mentioned.
Finally
, these two groups never want to
destor
Correct your spelling
destroy
the future of
childreens
Correct your spelling
children
life because of the
sence
Correct your spelling
sense
and
limitation
Fix the agreement mistake
limitations
show examples
that they have. I
recomend
Correct your spelling
recommend
that
attentions
Correct article usage
the attentions
show examples
of society have to focus on the other things that make
sence
Correct your spelling
sense
not
Add the comma(s)
, not
show examples
the things that are not
relible
Correct your spelling
reliable
.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, work on creating clearer connections between ideas. Use more linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your essay.
coherence cohesion
In the introduction, briefly outline the main points that you will discuss in the essay. Ensure that your conclusion summarizes these points and provides closure to your argument.
task achievement
Make sure your main points are well supported with specific and relevant examples. This will strengthen your argument and provide evidence for your claims.
task achievement
Develop your ideas in more depth to make your response more comprehensive. This involves expanding on your main points and providing further explanation and detail.
task achievement
Work on language accuracy. This includes correcting spelling mistakes (e.g., "childreen" should be "children") and improving sentence structures to make your essay clearer.
task achievement
You have clear ideas and a structured approach to your essay.
task achievement
You attempt to support your points with examples, which is good practice.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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