The diagram illustrates the process that is used to manufacture bricks for the builing industry. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram illustrates the process that is used to manufacture bricks for the builing industry. 

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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Overall
Linking Words
, the digger will dig the
clay
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
it will be put in the metal grid for rolling it.
Then
Linking Words
, it will be mixed with the sand and water in the wire cutter or a mould to turn into a
brick
Use synonyms
. After that, the
brick
Use synonyms
was
then
Linking Words
put into the drying oven.
Then
Linking Words
, the
brick
Use synonyms
is put in the
kiln
Use synonyms
and the cooling chamber after put in the
kiln
Use synonyms
.
Then
Linking Words
, the
brick
Use synonyms
is packaged and ready for delivery.
First,
Linking Words
the digger digs a large amount of
clay
Use synonyms
.
Second,
Linking Words
the
clay
Use synonyms
will be put in the metal grid for rolling.
Third,
Linking Words
the
clay
Use synonyms
will be mixed with the sand and the water,
then
Linking Words
it will be put in the wire or the mould for turning into the
bricks
Use synonyms
.
Then
Linking Words
, the
bricks
Use synonyms
are put into the drying oven for 24 to 48 hours.
Next,
Linking Words
the
bricks
Use synonyms
will
then
Linking Words
be put in the
kiln
Use synonyms
for moderating
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
200
Use synonyms
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
to 980
Use synonyms
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and put in the
kiln
Use synonyms
again for 870
Use synonyms
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
to 1300
Use synonyms
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
.
Then
Linking Words
, the
bricks
Use synonyms
are put in the cooling chamber for 48 to 72 hours after it is put in the
kiln
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, the
bricks
Use synonyms
are packaged, and it is readied for delivery.
Submitted by dondollaraus on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words clay, brick, kiln, bricks, celsius with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 1 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacture
  • brick(s)
  • building industry
  • digging
  • extraction
  • raw material
  • clay
  • mixing
  • moulding
  • wire cutting
  • drying oven
  • firing
  • kiln
  • high temperatures
  • hardening
  • cooling
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • traditional
  • modern
  • environmental considerations
  • sustainability practices
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