Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attension to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

People
generally believe that advertisements are a powerful
was
Correct your spelling
way
show examples
to attract
people
to buy
products
. Some others disagree and think that we rarely care for them anymore. Companies put so much money into commercials as a number of
people
are successfully captivated into
buyin
Correct your spelling
buying
the
products
.
This
is
due to
some reasons; first and foremost, well-known
artistes
Correct your spelling
artists
show examples
become
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
actors or
artist
Fix the agreement mistake
artists
show examples
in the media which surely
attract
Correct subject-verb agreement
attracts
show examples
most of their fans into buying the
products
due to
the idol's great influence on the community.
Secondly
, repeated slogans on TV or any media out there root deep into the
people
's
sub-counsciensness
Correct your spelling
subconsciousness
which eventually
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
them remember the brand and buy the
products
.
On the other hand
, some oppose
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
idea, saying that
people
care less about
this
anymore. Videos or posters which are made without creative ideas are usually dull
therefore
poeple
Correct your spelling
people
tend to skip those when it was playing. It is apparent that the majority of
poeple
Correct your spelling
people
skip the pop-up
video
Fix the agreement mistake
videos
show examples
or
banner
Fix the agreement mistake
banners
show examples
showing ads on
youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
.
To
Change preposition
In
show examples
my view, advertisements are still powerful tools to engage with the population, as long as they are made
creativelly
Correct your spelling
creative
and innovatively. Without a doubt, they have to be made involving liberal and brilliant youths; the use of new media should be put into consideration
besides
exploring the existing ones.
To conclude
, commercials are still a major and effective way to promote
products
to the majority of
people
yet it must be done in a more
engagging
Correct your spelling
engaging
way so as not to be skipped by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Submitted by kelly on

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grammar
Try to avoid minor spelling mistakes such as 'buyin' instead of 'buying' and 'sub-counsciensness' instead of 'sub-consciousness'.
task response
It would strengthen the argument to provide more specific examples, such as mentioning a specific advertisement campaign that succeeded or failed.
task response
Ensure to balance the discussion by elaborating more on why some people think that advertising is less effective. This could include mentioning digital tools like ad-blockers, or the oversaturation of advertisements in our daily lives.
task response
The essay provides a balanced discussion by considering both views.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and a well-rounded conclusion that effectively summarizes your position.
coherence cohesion
The main points are logically structured and easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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