In recent years, the rise of social media has significantly impacted the way people communicate and interact with each other. Discuss the effects of this trend on individuals and society. Suggest some possible solutions to mitigate its negative impacts.
Nowadays, individuals spend a huge amount of
time
on social Use synonyms
media
which has had a negative impact on Use synonyms
communication
, causes mental health problems and Use synonyms
harmful
effects on future job opportunities, which can be solvable.
Undeniably, Add a missing verb
has harmful
People
spend so much Use synonyms
time
on social Use synonyms
media
Use synonyms
who
don’t have enough opportunities to spend Correct word choice
and
time
with loved ones. Use synonyms
Such
a lack of Linking Words
communication
has a negative influence on mental health. Use synonyms
This
type of lifestyle normally leads to depression and isolation. Linking Words
Considering children
spend Verb problem
Children
time
on Instagram and follow the latest photos and videos of strangers Use synonyms
instead
of speaking with family members. Linking Words
Therefore
, violent content on Instagram causes mental disease on them. More importantly, if Linking Words
people
do not have enough Use synonyms
communication
with others, they will not learn how to deal with individuals. Use synonyms
This
type of behaviour has a harmful effect on future occupations because Linking Words
Correct pronoun usage
it
they
can not attract the attention of employees. Correct pronoun usage
it
This
is mainly because they do not have real Linking Words
communication
and they just use virtual interaction on social Use synonyms
media
and they can not express their abilities effectively. Use synonyms
Thus
, they have less chance to find a suitable job.
Linking Words
However
, these problems can be solved if they follow the specific schedule and register for valuable classes. First of all, they have to define a plan for using social Linking Words
media
and Use synonyms
also
spending Linking Words
time
with family members and friends. Use synonyms
For example
, Linking Words
people
have to eat dinner with family or invite friends over at the weekend which helps them to socialize. Use synonyms
Such
a plan assists them in discussing with others which protects them from various types of mental illness. Linking Words
Moreover
, Linking Words
people
have to participate in different educational courses. These classes not only help them to improve their knowledge but Use synonyms
also
give them more job prospects. Linking Words
Therefore
, they probably don’t have Linking Words
time
to scroll on social Use synonyms
media
.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, Linking Words
Although
social Linking Words
media
has some problems, solutions to them are not far from reach. Use synonyms
People
have to have a plan and Use synonyms
also
attend vocational and training classes.Linking Words
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task achievement
Your essay effectively covers the main points of the topic and provides solutions. However, specific examples to support your arguments would make your essay stronger. Try to include concrete instances or statistics where appropriate.
coherence cohesion
While your main points are logically structured and flow well, some transitions between paragraphs could be smoother. Additionally, some sentences feel slightly repetitive. Diversifying your vocabulary and sentence structures could enhance the readability and flow of your essay.
introduction conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and well-linked to the body paragraphs, helping to frame your arguments effectively.
coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a clear response to the task with relevant points discussed logically.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example