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Band 5.5

In future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statemtent?

#future #nobody #newspapers #books #statemtent
In today's rapidly evolving world, the ubiquitous internet and cutting-edge technology have paved the way for accessing information.
Therefore
, it is widely believed that printed newspapers and
books
 are becoming the things of the past. Personally, I go against
this
 suggestion for plenty of reasons. First of all, ebooks and news websites are not really free. We pay for the internet we use
also
 if it's observed that the public is increasingly relying on digital
books
,
this
 will motivate writers and news channels to impose monthly/yearly subscriptions or purchase the
books
,
moreover
, adopting
this
 initiative will make it complicated for elder people, as we know purchasing online requires several steps and a master card number,
as a
result
Add the comma(s)
result,
show examples
 a segment of the society will face unnecessary challenges.
Furthermore
, replacing paper
books
 with digital
books
 will be harmful to the eye. Considering the numerous jobs that
requires
Change the verb form
require
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to stare
Change the verb form
staring
show examples
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 a computer screen all day, it may be wise to give the eyes
break
Correct article usage
a break
show examples
 whenever you can,
moreover
Add a comma
moreover,
show examples
 electronic
books
 can cause screen fatigue, which may lead to blurred vision, redness, dryness, irritation, and even headaches. With print
books
 and newspapers, you don’t have to worry about any of that.
To conclude
, I firmly believe that the value of
peper
Correct your spelling
paper
books
 is tremendous and that we in fact pay for the things we read online or the internet we use daily,
in addition
 relying on digital pages will negatively affect our eyes,
as well as
 the ease of reading for the elderly.
Submitted by Ayreen🍒 on

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coherence cohesion
To further improve coherence and cohesion, consider using more transitional phrases to link your ideas. This will help guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.
task achievement
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that you review your work for minor grammatical errors and punctuation mistakes. Correcting these small inaccuracies will help improve the clarity of your writing.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction is strong and clearly states your position regarding the topic.
logical structure
You have provided a structured and logical response, addressing multiple aspects of the issue.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes your main arguments and reinforces your stance.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital media
  • Printed media
  • Accessibility
  • Sustainability
  • Environmental impact
  • Tactile experience
  • Digital divide
  • Screen fatigue
  • Demographic trends
  • Financial challenges
  • Content creation
  • Print media
  • Digital formats
  • Timeless quality
  • Convenience and immediacy
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