IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The bar chart below gives information about the spending habits of people in four countries on consumer goods in 2012. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below gives information about the spending habits of people in four countries on consumer goods in 2012. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #information #habits #people #four #countries #consumer #goods #features #comparisons
The illustration demonstrates how much
money
 was spent on different products of citizens in 4 European countries in 2012.
Overall
, the percentage of
expenditure
went
Correct pronoun usage
that went
show examples
 into all areas of British people stayed at the highest rate compared with others.
Conversely
, the demand of residents in Belgium and Austria for several types of goods was at the lowest position. The amount of
money
 spent on all examined goods
of
Change preposition
by
show examples
 British citizens remained at the peak, with the highest figure was the
expenditure
 on cameras and
toys
, at 170 and 167 respectively, followed by the spending in the realms of
toys
, books, cosmetics, games, and outdoor gear which ranged around 160.
By contrast
, the
expenditure
 on buying cameras, books, and
toys
 of Belgium presidents was
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
, fluctuating only around 145,
while
 the amount of
money
went
Correct pronoun usage
that went
show examples
 into games, outdoor accessories and cosmetics was at approximately 150. Cameras, which were bought the most by
Austria
Replace the word
Austrian
show examples
 people, stood at 165, followed by the figure for
expenditure
 on books and
toys
 at around 155.
In addition
,
Austria
Replace the word
Austrian
show examples
 citizens
consumed
Verb problem
spent
show examples
 less
money
 on cosmetics, games and outdoor products, just under 150. The figure for the
expenditure
 of Spain occupants in all types of products was relatively similar, just about 155 for each field.
Submitted by anhnguyen270407 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the first paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words money, expenditure, toys with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
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