IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Would you prefer to live in a traditional house or in a modern apartment building? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.

#house #apartment #support #choice
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If I was asked where I would I prefer to live in a traditional
house
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 or in a modern
apartment
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 building, I think, I would hesitate to answer.
This
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 question, from my point of view, is a controversial one. In the following
paragraphs
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paragraphs,
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 I will analyze both these options and present my view.
From
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On
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 the one side, living in a modern
apartment
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 building brings many benefits. First of all, it is cheaper
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then
Replace the word
than
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 living in a traditional
house
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 and paying different kinds of fees I am not familiar with.
For instance
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, my friend, who recently bought a new
house
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 for his family, said
me
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to me
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 that it is much easier to live in an
apartment
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 and I tend to believe him when I see his bills. So, living in an
apartment
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 will definitely help me to save some money. Second of all, since I live alone I do not need a big
house
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 with many rooms. I just need a bedroom and a living room where I can take my guests and have my
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
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. Another important benefit of living in an
apartment
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 is that I will not have to buy much cumbersome furniture in order to furnish all
rooms
Correct article usage
the rooms
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.
However
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, living in a modern
apartment
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 building can have a few disadvantages too.
Firstly
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, it can be noisy and,
secondly
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, I will not have any privacy outside my
apartment
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,
for example
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, in a pool or gym.
From
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On
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 the other side, living in a traditional
house
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 some advantages too.
For example
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, I can have my own pool, gym and a garden where I can relax and be alone.
However
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, living in a
house
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 is usually more expensive and requires more time to maintain a
house
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.
For instance
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, I will most likely have to hire someone to mow my lawn and clean my pool
not to mention
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 all household tasks inside the
house
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. In conclusion, I think at
this
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 moment I would prefer to live in an
apartment
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. It can help me save some money and
allows
Correct subject-verb agreement
allow
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 me to spend more time studying because I will not have to do many household tasks.
Submitted by anastasia on

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grammar
Try to avoid small grammatical errors such as 'then' instead of 'than' and 'said me' instead of 'told me'. These can impact the clarity of your points.
style
Vary your sentence structure more frequently to avoid repetitive patterns and to maintain the reader’s interest.
vocabulary
Consider adding a few more sophisticated vocabulary words to demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency.
content
The essay provides a balanced discussion by analyzing both options, which makes the argument more compelling.
structure
The introduction adequately presents the topic and outlines the approach that will be used.
structure
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides a clear stance on the topic.
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