Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Others think they should begin after 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In
this
era, there are
some evidence of Change the verb form
is
school
allowing Fix the agreement mistake
schools
childern
who is under 7 years of Correct your spelling
children
age
to begin
their formal education
. It appears that some people argue that this
phenomenon should not be happening. This
essay attempts to shed light both
arguments of Change preposition
on both
this
tendency.
First and foremost, sending childern
to Correct your spelling
children
school
in
Change preposition
at
their
early Change the word
an
age
can be advantageous to certain
Correct article usage
a certain
extens
. In some regions, Correct your spelling
extent
school
starts to allow young students to get a formal education
to begin
their education
jouney
Correct your spelling
journey
in
Change preposition
at
a
early Change the article
an
age
. It's believed that the early age
of education
can merits
the growth of Change the verb form
merit
intelegence
more easily rather than in a late Correct your spelling
intelligence
age
. For example
, the Citra Bangsa School
which is located in Jakarta, accept student
without any Add an article
a student
age
limit requirement and childern
under 7 years old can begin their Correct your spelling
children
education
at school
.
On the other hand
, there is a possibility that formal school
can negativelly
affect Correct your spelling
negatively
to
Change preposition
apply
childern's
mental, especially Correct your spelling
children's
in
a very early Change preposition
at
age
, considering their level of maturity and intelegence
. Formal Correct your spelling
intelligence
education
require
Change the verb form
requires
student
to study within many factors of pressure. Fix the agreement mistake
students
For instance
, there was a case that childern
Correct your spelling
children
in
a young Change preposition
at
age
had a
depression because of the pressure from studying at Remove the article
apply
school
. Parents should consider the level of maturity and intelegence
of their Correct your spelling
intelligence
childern
before sending them to get a formal Correct your spelling
children
education
to prevent them from depression. I do also
belive
that Correct your spelling
believe
this
approach should be well acknowledged by parents in society to reduce the amount of same
cases Correct word choice
apply
appear
in the future.
In conclusion, Correct pronoun usage
that appear
while
it is irrefutable that the ubiquity of formal education
in
Change preposition
at
a
early Change the article
an
age
to certain
Correct article usage
a certain
extens
, Correct your spelling
extent
extents
but
Correct word choice
apply
i
Change the capitalization
I
belive
that Correct your spelling
believe
childern
under 7 years of Correct your spelling
children
age
should not get a formal education
at school
.Submitted by muhammad.alfarasyi on
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coherence cohesion
Your introduction sets the stage, but it could be more clearly articulated. Ensure you present both views explicitly before stating that you'll discuss them.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion restates your position but should summarize the key arguments more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
task achievement
Introduce more vivid and relevant examples to illustrate your points effectively and support your arguments more robustly.
task achievement
Pay attention to minor grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. For example, 'childern' should be 'children' and 'intelegence' should be 'intelligence'.
task achievement
Your essay tackles both views, which shows a balanced approach to the task.
task achievement
You provide specific examples to support your argument, such as the mention of Citra Bangsa School.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?