The bar chart below illustrates five different industries’ percentage share of Brazil’s economy in 2009 and 2019 with a forecast for 2029. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#bar #five #industries’ #percentage #brazil’s #economy #forecast #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The par bar chart provides key information about five sectors industries:

Finance

, Food processing, manufacturing, Tourism, and

oil

, coal, and

gas

over a period of 10 years with expectations for 2029. The units are measured in percentages.

Overall

, it is clear from the graph that

Finance

was by far the most important

catogary

Correct your spelling

category

whereas

relatively Manufacturing

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

was the lowest one.

In addition

, Tourism and

oil

,coal and

gas

have mostly the same pattern over the period.

Furthermore

Oil

, coal, and

gas

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

the highest columns after

Finance

over the period shown.

According to

what is shown,

Finance

rose dramatically to a peak of 36% and 41%

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

between 2019 and 2029, respectively.

By contrast

, Manufacturing in 2029 will be negligible at nearly 5%.

Oil

, coal and

gas

in 2019 overtook Tourism, Manufacturing, and Food processing reaching

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

32%.

Moreover

, Food processing in 2029 will

decreasce

Correct your spelling

decrease

Change preposition

show examples

10%

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

and goes back to how it was in 2009.

Submitted by shahad.san966 on Wed Jun 19 2024

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words finance, oil, gas with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

157 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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