It is believed that the education system is the most critical factor to the development of a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this belief?

#education #system #factor #development #country #belief

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Education

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has long been recognized as a cornerstone of social progress, shaping not only individual futures but

also

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the collective advancement of the nation. It is considered that the

education

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system is essential for the advancement of a country. I completely agree with

this

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viewpoint because an

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education

Replace the word

educated

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populace drives economic growth and fosters

innovation

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Firstly

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, a robust

education

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system contributes to economic growth by creating a skilled workforce.

Education

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individuals are more likely to secure well-paying jobs, which boosts the

country

Change noun form

country's

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economy.

For instance

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, countries with high literacy rates,

such

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as Germany and Japan,have strong economies driven by their well-educated populations.

Secondly

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education

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fosters

innovation

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and technological advancement. Educated individuals are better equipped to think critically and solve complex problems. Silicon Valley in the United StatesStates is a prime example of how

education

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and

innovation

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go hand in hand,driving both technological progress and economic success

Moreover

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education

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promotes social development and reduces inequality. By providing equal access to

education

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countries can bridge the gap between different social classes. In conclusion, the

education

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system is indeed a fundamental factor in the development of the country. It not only drives economic growth and fosters

innovation

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but

also

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promotes social equality.

Therefore

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investing in

education

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should be a top priority for any nation aiming to achieve sustainable development.

Submitted by reemaljuaidi8 on Wed Jun 19 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on ensuring sentences connect more smoothly. For example, using more linking phrases can help improve the flow of the essay.

task achievement

Clarify and expand on the idea of social development and inequality a bit more to provide more comprehensive ideas on how education reduces inequality.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the argument well.

task achievement

The essay provides relevant specific examples, such as referencing Germany and Japan, and Silicon Valley.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

216 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Critical factor
Economic growth
Innovation
Informed citizenry
Social mobility
Disadvantaged backgrounds
Social and economic status
Holistic approach
Technology adoption
Industrial development
Environmental sustainability
Democratic processes
Decision-making
Political stability
Infrastructure development

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It is believed that the education system is the most critical factor to the development of a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this belief?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that illegal internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give own opinion.

It seems that many companies today are becoming much more concerned with profit than with the happiness of workers. How could companies take better care of their workers in the future? Give reasons to your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

Some people believe using modern technology (digital photographs, blogs) is the best way to record and remember important personal events. Others think the traditional method (making photo albums, writing diaries) is better. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries governments are investigating in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think is an appropriate use of government money?

Human activities have negative effects on the environment. Some people believe it is too late to take measures to prevent animals and plants from dying out. Others think actions should be taken to improve the situation. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.