It is believed that the education system is the most critical factor to the development of a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this belief?

#education #system #factor #development #country #belief

Education

has long been recognized as a cornerstone of social progress, shaping not only individual futures but

also

the collective advancement of the nation. It is considered that the

education

system is essential for the advancement of a country. I completely agree with

this

viewpoint because an

education

Replace the word

educated

show examples

populace drives economic growth and fosters

innovation

Firstly

, a robust

education

system contributes to economic growth by creating a skilled workforce.

Education

individuals are more likely to secure well-paying jobs, which boosts the

country

Change noun form

country's

show examples

economy.

For instance

, countries with high literacy rates,

such

as Germany and Japan,have strong economies driven by their well-educated populations.

Secondly

education

fosters

innovation

and technological advancement. Educated individuals are better equipped to think critically and solve complex problems. Silicon Valley in the United StatesStates is a prime example of how

education

and

innovation

go hand in hand,driving both technological progress and economic success

Moreover

education

promotes social development and reduces inequality. By providing equal access to

education

countries can bridge the gap between different social classes. In conclusion, the

education

system is indeed a fundamental factor in the development of the country. It not only drives economic growth and fosters

innovation

but

also

promotes social equality.

Therefore

investing in

education

should be a top priority for any nation aiming to achieve sustainable development.

Submitted by reemaljuaidi8 on Wed Jun 19 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on ensuring sentences connect more smoothly. For example, using more linking phrases can help improve the flow of the essay.

task achievement

Clarify and expand on the idea of social development and inequality a bit more to provide more comprehensive ideas on how education reduces inequality.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the argument well.

task achievement

The essay provides relevant specific examples, such as referencing Germany and Japan, and Silicon Valley.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

216 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Critical factor
Economic growth
Innovation
Informed citizenry
Social mobility
Disadvantaged backgrounds
Social and economic status
Holistic approach
Technology adoption
Industrial development
Environmental sustainability
Democratic processes
Decision-making
Political stability
Infrastructure development

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It is believed that the education system is the most critical factor to the development of a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this belief?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

These days, more people are going to university than in the past. They start work later in life and with higher qualifications. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation?

Many people use distance-learning program to study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the benefits as much as attending college or university. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Gender imbalance in some occupations is evident. To what extent do you think that it is acceptable?