Many elderly people are no longer looked after by their families but are put in care homes or nursing homes. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

The proportion of the elderly has been increasing throughout the world, which has caused the exuberance of kinds of nursing
homes
. In my opinion, despite some merits, many present nursing
homes
have an issue that cannot be ignored.
Care
homes
are the natural consequence of an ageing society, and they significantly relieve the nursing stress of the young.
As a result
of persistent low fertility, it has been increasingly common that two adults have to take
care
of four elders and a child simultaneously.
This
is especially typical in China, where,
according to
a demographic survey, about 40% of families exist in
this
structure and overwhelming nursing pressure forces them to appeal to
care
homes
. In
this
respect, the emergence of nursing
homes
is helpful in sharing with the young the stress of caring for the elderly.
However
, closely
along with
the advantages is an appealing issue of some nursing
homes
. It is the issue of abusing the elderly. Many of the elderly are sent to nursing
homes
mainly because of their inability to fend for themselves, which makes them extremely vulnerable to caregivers' deliberate harm. To illustrate, in 2017, there was sensational news that a caregiver serving for California State Hospital had a long time verbally abused the elderly living there and sometimes even pricked them with syringe needles. The outrageous news reminds us that current nursing
homes
may still have some serious disadvantages. In conclusion, the ageing trend has stimulated the rapid development of
care
homes
. They to a certain extent relieve the stress of the young, but
also
provide a greenhouse for intolerable behaviours,
such
as deliberately harming the elderly.
Therefore
, governments must enact pertinent laws to effectively regulate the operation of nursing
homes
Submitted by hx88375757 on

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task response
Your essay addresses the task effectively by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of the trend. However, to improve further, ensure you cover a wider range of points and examples.
coherence cohesion
While your ideas are clear and well-organized, some of your sentences can be more concise. Try to avoid overly complex sentences that may obscure your main points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which makes it easy to follow.
task response
The use of specific examples, such as the California State Hospital incident, strengthens your arguments and makes them more convincing.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Professional care
  • Medical attention
  • Trained staff
  • Social interaction
  • Combat loneliness
  • Safety and security
  • Relief for families
  • Loss of autonomy
  • Emotional impact
  • Cost
  • Financial strain
  • Quality of care
  • Neglect and abuse
  • Detachment from family
  • Mental wellbeing
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