It is generally believed that some people are born with certains talents, for instance for sport or music, and other are not. However, it is sometimes claimed tha any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both the views and gie your own opinion.

Many believe that some activities
likes
Change the verb form
like
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sport and music require in-born talent to achieve greater heights
while
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
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claim that
childern
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children
can be nurtured to
pursive
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pursue
such
carreers
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careers
carriers
and eventually become successful.
While
some talents are internally present, I personally feel that there is nothing in the world that cannot be learned or developed. Those who support that talent by birth
is
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are
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necessary
propose
Add the particle
to propose
show examples
that
such
person
Correct article usage
a person
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who has
these
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this
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God's gift can become famous in fields
such
as
sport
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sports
show examples
or music. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
who has a
melidious
Correct your spelling
melodious
voice and amazing sense of rhythm, tempo and wavelength without any proper training.
For example
, my friend can sing songs without any professional training, and his tune is just
mesmarising
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mesmerising
mesmerizing
.
Additionally
, people with physical and mental strength can showcase their ability in some sports like wrestling. A famous popular wrestler,Khali, is more than 7 feet tall, and
musular
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muscular
, and he was able to join WWF and become successful there because of his physical inborn gifts.
On the other hand
, I agree with those who argue that any child can be taught to become a good
sports person
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sportsperson
show examples
or musician if they
also
have
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
love and interest. As we already know, there are no
shortcut
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shortcuts
show examples
to success and hard work pays off. Most of the children pick up things faster and with proper training, they can be nurtured to become
a
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apply
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good
sportsman
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sportsmen
show examples
or
an
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apply
show examples
artist
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artists
show examples
. With proper guidance, hard work, determination and dedication, they can reach
top
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the top
show examples
spot in these life choices. To illustrate, many children learn piano and guitar at
early
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an early
show examples
age and those
intersted
Correct your spelling
interested
in them
further
develop
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
skills, and one day they can easily become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
popular
musician
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musicians
show examples
. Another example is where kids going to sports
academeny
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academy
for soccer and
crickers
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crackers
cricket
, develop
ability
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the ability
an ability
show examples
to play
top
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a top
show examples
quality
game
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games
show examples
. In conclusion,
while
people born with special talent may have an edge, it is wrong to assume that
such
qualities cannot be
taughed
Correct your spelling
taught
laughed
. I personally feel that with hard work, anything in life is achievable.
Submitted by sandeepniet17 on

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task achievement
Although your essay covers the discussion of both views, there are areas where clarity is needed. For instance, minor spelling and grammatical errors can affect the reader's understanding. Make sure to proofread your work. Examples include typos like 'persue,' 'melidious,' 'WWF,' 'intersted,' and 'esspesially' which should be corrected to 'pursue,' 'melodious,' 'WWE,' 'interested,' and 'especially.'
coherence cohesion
Your essay follows a clear structure and has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, using more complex sentence structures and cohesive devices could enhance the logical flow of your essay. Additionally, ensure paragraphing supports the coherence of your ideas by clearly indicating a shift in points.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument, providing relevant examples to support your points. This demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and the ability to discuss multiple perspectives.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is generally well-organized, with each paragraph focusing on one main idea. This helps in maintaining the clarity and logical progression of your essay.

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