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Band 5

in some countries, the cost livig rapidly increasing. what do you think may be the reasons for this? what effects might this have on society?

#countries #cost #livig #effects #society
Living costs in some countries are swiftly rising
this
 is because the
nation
Replace the word
national
show examples
 rate is high.
As a result
, the
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 buying
power
 is weakened.
This
 essay will discuss how it has become the main reason and how it affects society's purchasing
power
. Increased prices of goods and services are driven by
inflation
. there are various
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 why
inflation
 happens
such
 as an unmanageable increase in the money supply. Indonesian 1998 is an example of a
country
 where the living cost at that time rose greatly
due to
inflation
. The nation was unstable, which created an economic crisis.
Consequently
, primary, secondary, and even tertiary needs prices were unaffordable for some
people
. A
remarks
Fix the agreement mistake
remark
show examples
 and notable effect of
inflation
 is the purchasing
power
 of the
people
 is weakened. Still in Indonesia in 1998, low to middle-class economy
people
can
Wrong verb form
could
show examples
 not afford basic food needs
such
 as eggs, potatoes and rice
due to
 their prices in the market. The station was forcing the seller to put an unreasonable price
due to
 stabilizing the economy and political situation at that period of time.
Therefore
, only several groups of
people
 could afford to buy the things they need
as a consequence
if
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
inflation
 or in other terms, it has lessened their purchasing
power
. Another
country
 that had an experience with
this
 issue was Venezuela in 2022 with approximately three hundred per cent of
inflation
 rate. In conclusion, maintaining the supply of money in a
country
 is crucial and indisputable;
otherwise
, a
country
 will face the following problems
such
 as an economic crisis which affects the society's purchasing
power
.
Submitted by bram.admiral on

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task achievement
Great use of specific examples to support your arguments (e.g., Indonesia in 1998 and Venezuela in 2022).
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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