The graph below shows the percentage ofhouseholds with different kinds of technology in theU.S.from 1995 to 1999.Summarize the informationby selecting and reporting the main features, andmake comparisons where relevant.Write at least 150 words.
The given line chart illustrates the percentage of households with different kinds of technology in the U.S from 1995 to 1999,
It is clear that
DVD players were the lowest type of technology owned by a household in 1999 with approximately 40 % of households.
First of all, washing machines is
the most popular technological device in all five years and witnessed a 20% increase between 1995 and 1999, Wrong verb form
were
In addition
, the percentage of computers in houses have
jumped significantly as shown in the line chart.
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
Furthermore
, computers were second
most common electronics in households until 1998, Correct article usage
the second
Nonetheless
, suddenly in the middle of 1998 the rate of phones took over second place. Which
means in 1999 Correct pronoun usage
This
computer
we Fix the agreement mistake
computers
third
common device.
In conclusion, DVD players were the least technology owned in a household, Correct article usage
the third
Whereas
washing machines were the most common.Submitted by yazanalt523 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼