- Many high street shops have gone out of business in recent years. Why do you think this has happened? Is it a positive or negative development?
Shopping is
inseparable
part of every individual. In the modern era, technology paves its path and makes it more accessible for everyone. By increasing the popularity of an online version, it is believed that the traditional one of marketing is eradicated. Add an article
an inseparable
This
essay will express the reasons for this
phenomenon and its effects .
The development of technology leads to numerous changes in the diverse aspects of lives and shopping is no exception. The online manner of shopping has become more prevalent among people, due to
its simple accessibility. In other words
, most of the traditional stores have specific timetable
which Fix the agreement mistake
timetables
does
not match Correct subject-verb agreement
do
with
people’s Change preposition
apply
schedule
. Fix the agreement mistake
schedules
For example
, ones who have to work until night do not have an opportunity to shop, the accessibility to the modern stores is, however
, round-the-clock. Consequently
, the all benefits of it and also
people’s tendencies towards being up-to-date makes
it Correct subject-verb agreement
make
as
the foremost manner of marketing.
Considering all its drawbacks, it has numerous positive effects on buyers Change preposition
apply
as well as
sellers and societies. It may be argued that developing state-of-the-art markets would jeopardize the local ones. Considering that if the traditional ones acclimate their trades to technological versions, they could advance their markets from locale to the widen one. Besides
, it can be a good solution for saving time and reducing traffic congestion. For example
, statistic illustrates that 30% of congestion in cities is caused by citizens tend
to shop. All in all, it can benefit by solving cities’ issues and Wrong verb form
tending
also
develop
small local stores.
In conclusion, the Internet caused many transformations in Wrong verb form
developing
lives
. shopping as a daily activity, which involves everybody, Correct pronoun usage
our lives
also
has been
changed. Unnecessary verb
apply
Except
its drawbacks, it has numerous pros which readily Add the preposition
Except for
has
been developed Correct subject-verb agreement
have
in
all over the world.Change preposition
apply
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task achievement
Your essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both reasons for the phenomenon and its effects thoroughly. However, more relevant specific examples could enhance your argument. Try to incorporate more concrete and varied examples to strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is generally well-organized, and there is a clear progression of ideas. The introduction and conclusion are present and effective. To improve coherence, ensure that each paragraph further develops a single main idea and transitions smoothly to the next point.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences are quite complex and could be made clearer with simpler language or varied sentence structures. You may introduce linkers or transition words to provide a more seamless flow to your ideas.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction effectively sets up the essay, clearly stating the topic and the two main areas you will discuss: reasons for the closure of high street shops and its impact.
logical structure
The use of transitions like 'In other words', 'For example', and 'Considering that' helps connect your ideas, enhancing the logical structure and overall coherence.
complete response
You successfully address the task by discussing both the reasons why high street shops are going out of business and evaluating whether this is a positive or negative development.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?