Some people think that Olympic games are exciting events that bring other nations together. Others say Olympic is a waste of money and the money could be better spent on other things. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
The Olympic
Games
have long been a subject of debate, with some viewing them as thrilling events that unite nations, while
others consider them a waste of resources that could be better allocated elsewhere
. Both perspectives have merit and warrant a closer examination.
Proponents of the Olympics
argue that these games
are more than just athletic competitions; they are global events that foster international unity and cultural exchange. The Olympics
provide a platform for athletes from diverse backgrounds to showcase their talents, promoting a spirit of camaraderie and sportsmanship. For instance
, the Olympics
encourage countries to put aside their differences and come together in the name of friendly competition. Additionally
, the games
can inspire young people to engage in sports and pursue athletic excellence, fostering a healthier society. The international exposure also
boosts tourism and global recognition for the host country, potentially leading to long-term economic benefits
.
On the other hand
, critics argue that the enormous financial burden of hosting the Olympics
often outweighs the benefits
. The cost of building infrastructure, such
as stadiums, transportation networks, and accommodations, can run into billions of dollars. For example
, the 2016 Rio de Janeiro Olympics
faced significant criticism for the extensive public spending amidst Brazil's economic struggles. Critics suggest that these funds could be better spent on essential public services like healthcare, education, and social welfare, which have a more immediate and lasting impact on the well-being of the population. Moreover
, the infrastructure built for the Olympics
often falls into disuse after the event, leading to wasted resources and ongoing maintenance costs.
In my opinion, while
the Olympics
have undeniable benefits
in terms of promoting international unity and sportsmanship, the financial implications cannot be overlooked. To balance both views, it is crucial for the International Olympic Committee and host nations to implement more sustainable practices. This
could include using existing facilities, investing in multipurpose venues that benefit the community long after the games
are over, and ensuring transparency in spending.
In conclusion, the Olympic Games
have the potential to bring nations together and inspire individuals globally. However
, the financial burden they impose must be carefully managed to ensure that the benefits
outweigh the costs. By adopting more sustainable and fiscally responsible practices, the Olympics
can continue to be a celebrated global event without compromising essential public services.Submitted by tahsin.adam3 on
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task achievement
Your task response is excellent. You provided a balanced discussion of both viewpoints and stated your own opinion clearly. This effectively covers all parts of the prompt.
task achievement
While your ideas are clear and comprehensive, adding a few more specific statistics or real-life examples could strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and logical structure, which is crucial for coherence and cohesion. Each paragraph flows smoothly to the next, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
coherence cohesion
To further improve, ensure each point is explicitly supported with evidence or examples. For instance, more details on how the Olympics promote international unity or specifics on post-event infrastructural uses would be beneficial.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are very effective in framing the discussion and summarizing your viewpoint. This provides a strong sense of closure for the reader.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are well-supported and logically structured, demonstrating a strong command of essay organization.
task achievement
You provide a balanced and nuanced discussion, which is essential for a high task achievement score. The essay clearly addresses both sides of the argument and offers a thoughtful opinion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example