The charts below give information on the location and types of dance classes young people in a town in Australia are currently attending. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The pie chart illustrates
location
of dance classes young Add an article
the location
people
in a town in Australia are currently participating,
Change preposition
in, while
while
the bar graph shows types
of dance classes young Correct article usage
the types
people
tend to learn by age group.
Overall
, the first pie chart showed the biggest segment of location
young Fix the agreement mistake
locations
people
are
recently Verb problem
have
participating
Wrong verb form
participated
was
private Change preposition
in was
studios
, while
the smallest slice was college-based studios
. The second column graph depicted
young Wrong verb form
depicts
people
who
under 11 tend to learn ballet, Correct pronoun usage
apply
while
young people
between 11 and 16 prefer to learn modern.
In regard to a
location of dance classes young Correct article usage
the
people
are currently attending, private studios
was
the biggest sector Change the verb form
were
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
accounted
for 48 Wrong verb form
accounting
percentages
, Replace the word
per cent
while
college-based studios
was
the smallest segment Change the verb form
were
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
made
up 10 Wrong verb form
making
percentages
. Meanwhile, school halls (after-school) and community halls and Replace the word
per cent
other
were at 24 Fix the agreement mistake
others
percentages
and 18 Replace the word
per cent
percentages
respectively.
In the bar graph, young Replace the word
per cent
people
between 11 and 16 reached a
highest number of over 500 tend to learn modern and Correct article usage
the
a
lowest number of 300 prefer to learn ballet. Change the article
the
Moreover
, young people
under 11 represented a
highest number of 600 Change the article
the
Correct pronoun usage
who like
like
to learn balletWrong verb form
liked
,
and indicated the lowest level of 300 Remove the comma
apply
tend
to learn modern.Correct pronoun usage
who tend
Submitted by wang1sh1ng on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, studios, percentages with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 4 times.
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