Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is not debatable that a university is a place that provides unlimited academic knowledge.
While
other Linking Words
students
want to diversify their studies, I side with those who Use synonyms
focus
on their main Use synonyms
subjects
.
On the one hand, it could be argued that learning multiple Use synonyms
subjects
could pose two challenges for the Use synonyms
students
. Use synonyms
Firstly
, they will need more funds. To illustrate, the more they learn about a subject, the more complex it becomes. If they cannot calculate how much Linking Words
time
, energy, and headspace they have to learn other Use synonyms
subjects
, they will find Use synonyms
difficult
to meet the objectives of the course that usually requires them to work on different assignments. Correct pronoun usage
it difficult
Consequently
, they will get a bad score and make them to retake the same course in the following academic year, which requires them to prepare additional costs. Linking Words
Secondly
, they may have lack of Linking Words
time
to maintain the right balance between their studies and leisure activities. As they dedicate their Use synonyms
time
to learning multiple Use synonyms
subjects
, they will probably have limited freedom to explore their non-academic interests. In a very bad possibility, they may experience burnout.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, I agree with those who argue that focusing on Linking Words
subjects
related to one qualification is more important. Use synonyms
First,
Linking Words
students
could be an expert in a particular field. Gaining an in-depth, specialist knowledge of a subject requires a certain level of Use synonyms
focus
and dedication over a long period. Use synonyms
As a result
, they will have a comprehensive understanding towards the subject they learn so that they can be a proficient individual in the related work setting. Another important point is that the Linking Words
students
could save extra money. If they could Use synonyms
focus
on the main Use synonyms
subjects
, they would have no potential bad scores. Because of Use synonyms
this
, they could graduate or gain qualification on Linking Words
time
.
In conclusion, Use synonyms
while
learning multiple Linking Words
subjects
could possibly make the Use synonyms
students
not only prepare more funds and have a lack on doing leisure activities, they can be experts and save extra money if they Use synonyms
focus
solely on their main Use synonyms
subjects
. I, Use synonyms
therefore
, remain convinced that focusing on the main Linking Words
subjects
is more important.Use synonyms
Submitted by alfinkarimah008 on
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task achievement
In the introduction, make sure to clearly present both views. You mentioned your own stance early, which is good, but ensure both viewpoints are also clearly introduced.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the question effectively, but using more relevant and specific examples can strengthen your points further. Try to integrate more real-world examples or detailed hypothetical scenarios to illustrate your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of ideas is good, but there are occasional minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings. To improve clarity, consider proofreading to eliminate errors such as 'they will find difficult' (should be 'they will find it difficult') and 'have lack of time' (should be 'have a lack of time').
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a strong structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly and maintains clear connections between ideas. For instance, when discussing costs and burnout, make sure each contrast is explicit for maximum clarity.
task achievement
You presented a balanced discussion of both views, providing clear reasoning for each side before restating your own position.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and clearly states your personal opinion, which ties the essay together nicely.
coherence cohesion
You used appropriate linking words to connect ideas within paragraphs, which helps maintain the flow of the essay.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example