You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The advancement of technology has changed the way
people
reading
Wrong verb form
read
show examples
wide information, leaving the
newspapers
and moving
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
online
instead
. I firmly believe that online articles and magazines become more effective and cheaper than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
paper media.
This
essay will elucidate
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the reasons and agreements of which
newspapers
have been changed to online. On the one hand, websites and applications provide a
lot
Add the preposition
lot of
show examples
information about up-to-date world circumstances, thanks to the internet. As the internet
enable
Change the verb form
enables
show examples
people
to connect with all
people
around the world,
news
can be published
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
website
Fix the agreement mistake
websites
show examples
such
as BBC
News
or Tempo
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
readers can access through their smartphones.
Therefore
,
people
do not have to wait for a long time until the
news
is handed to them like
newspapers
do. To elaborate more, companies in
this
media field need
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
time to print and publish
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
before
sell
Change the verb form
selling
show examples
them to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
customers. On the one hand, the publication of online
news
or magazines can save much money when it utilizes
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
compared to
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
newspapers
which need
high
Add an article
a high
the high
show examples
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
for production including printing
expanses
Correct your spelling
expenses
show examples
and distributing
expanses
Correct your spelling
expenses
show examples
from fabrics to communities.
Therefore
, many media companies that used to sell
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
change
Wrong verb form
changed
show examples
to online.
This
occurrence in Indonesia like Tribun Timur and Kompas is
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
proof that
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
been considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a thing of the past that in the near future will not be totally used anymore. In conclusion,
due to
the fact that online
news
become more effective to access and cheaper to publish, both readers and publishers have
leaved
Correct your spelling
left
show examples
the
newspapers
.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Strengthen your introduction by providing a clearer thesis statement. For instance, state explicitly whether you agree, disagree, or partly agree with the statement.
coherence cohesion
To enhance logical structure, break down your paragraphs with clear topic sentences and supporting details. For example, if discussing cost efficiency, start with a clear topic sentence like, 'One significant advantage of online news is its cost efficiency.'
coherence cohesion
Include transitions between ideas and paragraphs to improve the flow of your essay. Using linking words like 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' and 'However,' can help guide your reader through your arguments.
task achievement
The essay presents clear reasons for the decline of newspapers, such as cost efficiency and immediate access to information.
task achievement
The essay includes appropriate examples, like the mention of BBC News and news publishers in Indonesia, which add relevance and specificity.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and clearly states the writer's perspective.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: