IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The number of people working online from home has grown in some countries. What advantages and disadvantages can come of this trend?

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The idea of working remotely has
gain
Change the verb form
gained
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 popularity in some countries in recent times.
While
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this
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 may shape the future of
modern
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the modern
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 workforce,
this
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consist
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consists
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 of both negative
,
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apply
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 and positive outcomes which will be discussed
at
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in
show examples
this
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 essay.
Increase
Correct article usage
An increase
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 in
work life
Add a hyphen
work-life
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 balance is one of the key outcomes of
this
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 initiative.
To begin
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 with,
employees
Use synonyms
 get the chance to organize their daily schedules
according to
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 the workload that they need to put in.
For instance
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, a working mother will get the chance to drop off her kid
to
Change preposition
at
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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school and start work without having to worry about it.
Moreover
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,
employees
Use synonyms
 will be able to eliminate time spent commuting to the office which will ultimately result in
more
Add an article
a more
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 productive workforce.
Finally
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,
this
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 has
result
Wrong verb form
resulted
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Use synonyms
employees
Change preposition
in employees
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 having the time to improve their mental and physical fitness.
On the contrary
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, isolation from the office
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
 has
his
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 own demerits.
Firstly
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, companies have recently found out that lack of interaction between
employees
Use synonyms
 has reduced
camradarie
Correct your spelling
camaraderie
 among teams, and
This
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 has resulted in an
increase
Replace the word
increased
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 number of conflicts.
In addition
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 to that,
amployee
Correct your spelling
employee
 attrition has surged drastically resulting
companies
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in companies
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to cancel
Change the verb form
cancelling
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 projects
due to
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of resources. In conclusion, even though working from home has a definite advantage for many people, one cannot ignore the impact it has
for
Change preposition
on
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 some businesses.
Therefor
Correct your spelling
Therefore
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 I am
on
Change preposition
of
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 the view that the future of work
shold
Correct your spelling
should
 consist of a hybrid model.

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grammar
Ensure you proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and typos, such as 'has gain' should be 'has gained', 'at this essay' should be 'in this essay', and 'this consist' should be 'this consists'.
examples
Expand on your examples and ensure they are relevant and specific to better support your arguments. For example, provide a statistic or a case study about remote work improving work-life balance or causing employee attrition.
depth
Work on developing your ideas more fully in each paragraph. For instance, elaborate further on how remote work leads to improved mental and physical fitness.
structure
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provide a good structure to your argument.
relevance
Your points are relevant to the topic and show an understanding of both sides of the argument.
balance
You effectively mention both advantages and disadvantages, creating a balanced view on the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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