Topic: Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people. Task: what are the advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games?

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Nowadays,It is becoming more and more popular for either

children

Use synonyms

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

community to play

games

Use synonyms

with

computers

Use synonyms

and

also

Linking Words

many doctors are worried about their health problems.It is believed that the majority of young people tend to play with their

computers

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for

along

Correct your spelling

a long

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time.As a matter of fact,there are a lot of advantages and disadvantages of playing with laptops for younger populations.In

this

Linking Words

essay,I will address some benefits and drawbacks of playing with computer

games

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. Let's begin by looking at some pros of computer

games

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which are played by

children

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.It is considered that the young generation might be able to

develope

Correct your spelling

develop

their skills

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with

show examples

the help of video

games

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For instance

Linking Words

,juvenile people can not only improve their coordination with other players in online computer

games

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,But

also

Linking Words

they may empower their concentration on these entertainments.Generally speaking,some video

games

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are vital for

children

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to assess their capability to compare various things together. Turning to the other side of the argument,playing with electronic

computers

Use synonyms

could have some cons.

Firstly

Linking Words

,the method of the game might not be appropriate for young populations.

In other words

Linking Words

,some of the video

games

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are comprised

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show examples

either world war or

zambei

Change the capitalization

Zambei

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attack

Fix the agreement mistake

attacks

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that can influence

Change preposition

apply

show examples

children

Use synonyms

mind

Fix the agreement mistake

minds

show examples

Secondly

Linking Words

,playing with

computers

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for

along

Correct your spelling

a long

show examples

time might be destructive for

children

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's eyes.Actually,If the young community spend

Remove the article

apply

show examples

plenty of time

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

watching

Use synonyms

computers screen

Fix the agreement mistake

computer screens

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,they will suffer from weak eyes.

To conclude

Linking Words

,despite the fact that playing with

computers

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juvenile

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juveniles

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and

children

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can improve their individual skills like

corporation

Correct your spelling

cooperating

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with others,It

also

Linking Words

may affect seriously

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their

mind

Fix the agreement mistake

minds

show examples

and eyes.

TUTOOWed Jun 26 2024

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language

Work on improving sentence structure and grammatical accuracy. There are several minor errors that affect the readability of the essay.

task response

Include more specific examples to provide stronger support for your points. This will help to illustrate your arguments better and make them more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Strengthen the introduction and conclusion. While they are present, they can be more compelling and better summarize the main points.

task response

The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages of playing computer games, which shows a good understanding of the task.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is clear, with distinct sections for advantages and disadvantages.

language

The essay demonstrates a fair range of vocabulary and ideas.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Topic: Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people. Task: what are the advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games?

some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. others disagree and think that the host contry should welcome cultural differences. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

some people think that in the mordern world we are more dependent on each other. Others argue that people have become more independent.

The question: In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve the growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?