Topic: Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people. Task: what are the advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games?
Nowadays,It is becoming more and more popular for either
children
or young
community to play Correct article usage
the young
games
with computers
and also
many doctors are worried about their health problems.It is believed that the majority of young people tend to play with their computers
for along
time.As a matter of fact,there are a lot of advantages and disadvantages of playing with laptops for younger populations.In Correct your spelling
a long
this
essay,I will address some benefits and drawbacks of playing with computer games
.
Let's begin by looking at some pros of computer games
which are played by children
.It is considered that the young generation might be able to develope
their skills Correct your spelling
develop
by
the help of video Change preposition
with
games
.For instance
,juvenile people can not only improve their coordination with other players in online computer games
,But also
they may empower their concentration on these entertainments.Generally speaking,some video games
are vital for children
to assess their capability to compare various things together.
Turning to the other side of the argument,playing with electronic computers
could have some cons.Firstly
,the method of the game might not be appropriate for young populations.In other words
,some of the video games
are comprised to
either world war or Change preposition
of
zambei
Change the capitalization
Zambei
attack
that can influence Fix the agreement mistake
attacks
on
Change preposition
apply
children
's mind
.Fix the agreement mistake
minds
Secondly
,playing with computers
for along
time might be destructive for Correct your spelling
a long
children
's eyes.Actually,If the young community spend a
plenty of time Remove the article
apply
for
watching Change preposition
apply
computers screen
,they will suffer from weak eyes.
Fix the agreement mistake
computer screens
To conclude
,despite the fact that playing with computers
by juvenile
and Fix the agreement mistake
juveniles
children
can improve their individual skills like corporation
with others,It Correct your spelling
cooperating
also
may affect seriously on
their Change preposition
apply
mind
and eyes.Fix the agreement mistake
minds
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language
Work on improving sentence structure and grammatical accuracy. There are several minor errors that affect the readability of the essay.
task response
Include more specific examples to provide stronger support for your points. This will help to illustrate your arguments better and make them more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the introduction and conclusion. While they are present, they can be more compelling and better summarize the main points.
task response
The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages of playing computer games, which shows a good understanding of the task.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is clear, with distinct sections for advantages and disadvantages.
language
The essay demonstrates a fair range of vocabulary and ideas.