Some people believe that it is wrong to keep animals in zoo while others think that zoo are both entertainment and fun, discuss both the views and give your opinions.

Zoos
have been one of the most controversial topics worldwide.
While
, many people argue that those spots have no the most convenient properties to be considered a proper habitat where
animals
should not only be nurtured but
also
live, many others believe that there are many tools that have allowed us to create the proper
enviroments
Correct your spelling
environment
environments
to breed
animals
. I consider that both sides have to be taken into account, and in
this
essay, I will explain my reasons in detail. To start with, it is well-known that all
animals
have their own physiological attributes and features in order to survive in wildlife.
Therefore
, humanity has to respect
environment
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the environment
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as well as
ecosystems by caring
all
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for all
show examples
flaura
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flora
and fauna.
This
means that
animals
or plants belong to a specific region,
then
Correct word choice
and then
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any variation will lead to an
umbalance
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imbalance
unbalanced
unbalance
ecosystem.
For instance
, biologists have proved that since travelling to the North Pole has been allowed, most bears have changed their behaviours because of
the
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their
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interaction with humans.
As a consequence
of
this
, their natural patterns and traits have been modified.
Conversely
, many zoologists argue that the environmental characteristics which are required to simulate proper habitats have been achieved by
implemeting
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implementing
the most innovative methods already invented.
Consequently
, all
zoos
must
fulfill
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fulfil
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the
requiriments
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requirements
to guarantee that the places where they are bringing up and taking care
animals
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of animals
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have the necessary atmosphere to avoid changing their nature.
For instance
, The Australian Government has established that
zoos
where there are koalas should respect their pattern of sleep
during
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for
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16 hours
as well as
prevent them
for spread
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from spreading
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contagious of Chlamydia sp. because it is the most common cause of death.
To sum up
,
although
zoos
have been considered places where caged
animals
are not being cared
by
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for by
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the population, many other characteristics should be taken into
accounts
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account
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,
such
purposes
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as purposes
show examples
, agreements done by governments, and cutting-edge techniques that have been implemented in order to resemble
to
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apply
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their habitats.
Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on

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introduction conclusion
Work on providing a clearer introduction and conclusion. The introduction should explicitly state the purpose of the essay, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points discussed.
language accuracy
Be careful with minor language errors. Words like 'nurtured' and 'breeding' can imply different contexts and may not always fit perfectly. Also, ensure the use of prepositions like 'by caring all flaura and fauna' should be 'by caring for all flora and fauna'. A slight improvement in language accuracy will elevate the essay's clarity.
cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to maintain the flow of the essay, particularly between paragraphs discussing contrasting viewpoints.
task response
The essay covers both viewpoints comprehensively, providing balanced arguments and relevant specific examples to support each side. This reflects a deep understanding of the topic and solid analytical skills.
logical structure
Logical structure is commendable, making it easy to follow the argument presented. Paragraphs are well-organized and coherent.
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