Some people think that it is more effective for students to study in groups while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. Discuss both views and give your own opinion?
In
this
day and age, group
study
is more beneficial for students has
become a broad Correct word choice
and has
issues
in the general public. Some people argue that it is good for pupils to learn on their own. Correct the article-noun agreement
issue
However
, it seems to me that cooperating with others and making progress alone have both sides. The following essay will shed light on this
view.
To begin
with, these people hold Correct article usage
the ideas
ideas
that Fix the agreement mistake
idea
study
in Wrong verb form
studying
group
is effective. A very important point to consider Add an article
the group
a group
that
learning in Add a missing verb
is that
group
helps pupils know how to interact with their Add an article
a group
the group
group
mates. This
means that schoolchild
have a valuable conversation to Fix the agreement mistake
schoolchildren
discussion
and solutions to address the problems. To illustrate Replace the word
discuss
this
point, a good example for
Change preposition
of
this
is that when they give a presentation of their team product for teacher
and classmates; during their sessions, if they face to conflict, they would solve it in the team. Another point Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
i
would like to make is that Change the capitalization
I
puplis
can improve their personal skill and Correct your spelling
pupils
problems solving
skills through working as a band. Correct your spelling
problem-solving
This
is because
the fact that the schoolchild Add the preposition
because of
facilitate
constructive discussions and Change the verb form
facilitates
develop
together.
Correct subject-verb agreement
develops
On the other hand
, others think that learning individual
is better. They believe that the Change the word
individually
students
Correct quantifier usage
more students
more
Add a missing verb
are more
independently
in Change the word
independent
study
, the more they will focus on lessons. Add an article
the study
For instance
, when the student need
to learn by heart their lesson, they would like to Change the verb form
needs
learning
on their own than in Wrong verb form
learn
group
. Add an article
a group
Moreover
, it is evident that when students study
by themselves, they can prioritize their private target
.
Fix the agreement mistake
targets
To sum up
, people should have further
consideration on this
issue. In my opinion, they should adopt some ways to learn in groups or study
lonesome is
Verb problem
alone, it
depend
on Wrong verb form
depends
Correct article usage
the pupils
pupils
choice. Change noun form
pupils'
pupil's
However
, both learning methods also
have advantages and disadvantages, schoolchildren need to know how to control and balance between group
study
and self-study
.Submitted by quynhtranhbh on
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coherence cohesion
You have provided a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both views, and a conclusion. However, the essay's flow could be improved by making smoother transitions between points and paragraphs.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, try to provide more detailed examples and explanations to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
task achievement
There are several areas where your word choice and sentence structure could be refined. Reviewing these areas will help in achieving a clearer and more formal tone, which is crucial for IELTS writing.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repeating similar ideas. Rather, delve deeper into each point by providing more unique insights and concrete examples.
task achievement
You have addressed both views on the given topic, demonstrating a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, framing your discussion well.
task achievement
There is a clear attempt to provide examples, which helps in illustrating your points.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?