Some people believe that the best way to deal with heavy traffic in city centers is for privately owned cars to be banned, others however, think this is an unrealistic solution. Discuss both views and give your opinion
Heavy
traffic
is one of the problems that city
Correct article usage
the city
centers
population may suffer from. Correct subject-verb agreement
center
Such
a crisis may occur due to
several factors. In context, Despite
, many humans Change preposition
apply
are
with the idea that preventing private Verb problem
agree
cares
would be a great solution, Fix the agreement mistake
care
others
consider Correct word choice
while others
this
solution unrealistic. I partially agree with this
idea. Both point
of Change to a plural noun
points
views
are to be debated in the following paragraphs.
On the one hand, peoples Fix the agreement mistake
view
whom
believe that private cars banning can Change the pronoun
who
over come
Correct your spelling
overcome
traffic
in the city
centers
have a valid point of view, as decreasing the Change the spelling
centres
quantity
of cars that are using the main roads can lead to Change the quantifier
number
significant
reduction in Add an article
a significant
the
Correct article usage
apply
traffic
respectively. Meanwhile
Add a comma
Meanwhile,
this
is difficult to be applied, but usage of pubic
transportation can sustain the private cars efficiently with no retardation for the employees to reach their worksite.
Correct your spelling
public
On the other hand
, many people opine banning owned vehicles is unapplicable
as the public transportation in return will be catastrophically crowded, Correct your spelling
inapplicable
as a result
, this
could affect the
society negatively as the workers will not be able to be in their jobs at the time, so workers have to wake up earlier in order to compensate for the delay resulting from public Correct article usage
apply
traffic
, ultimately this
will result in futile performance in the job as workers will experience fatigue during working hours.
Finally
, to conclude
that
, decreasing private vehicles can affect positively Correct word choice
apply
city
centers
Fix the agreement mistake
center
traffic
, however
, If the
urban transportation is not Correct article usage
apply
will
developed to accommodate Verb problem
apply
for
the numerous people Change preposition
apply
to use
it the Wrong verb form
using
city
will face a disaster. Despite this
debate
I suggest Add a comma
debate,
to build
a side Change the verb form
building
city
housings
that Fix the agreement mistake
housing
are
connected to the Correct subject-verb agreement
is
city
center
with trains and buses.Change the spelling
centre
Submitted by besoyam on
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introduction
Introduction should be clear and concise. Avoid repetitive phrases. Instead of 'Both point of views are to be debated', use 'In this essay, I will discuss both perspectives.'
body paragraphs
Improve the logical structure of body paragraphs. Ensure evidence strictly supports the main points. For instance, explain how public transportation can sustain efficiency without inconvenience.
language
Avoid spelling and grammatical mistakes. Use 'people who' instead of 'peoples whom', 'public transportation' instead of 'pubic transportation,' and so forth.
examples
Provide relevant specific examples or evidence supporting your points. For instance, mention how other cities have successfully reduced traffic by enhancing public transportation. Include hypothetical or real-life instances that clearly support your argument.
conclusion
The conclusion should not introduce new ideas like 'build a side city housings'. This wasn’t discussed in the body and creates a disjoint.
structure
Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
engagement
Your essay engages with both sides of the argument.
conclusion
Your conclusion provides a summary of your arguments, which is good.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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