Sport has an important role in society. Some people believe that it is nothing more than leisure activities. Discuss both and give your own opinion.

#sport #role #society #people #leisure #activities

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Some

people

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think that

sports

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have many impacts on society,

while

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other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

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insist that they are only relaxing

activities

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. From my perspective, I consider relaxing is not the sole function of

sports

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and it

yield

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yields

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many benefits for

individuals

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and society. On the one hand, one main reason why some

people

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reckon

sports

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only as leisure

activities

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is that participating in physical

sports

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indeed relieves

individuals

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' pressure,

thus

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many

people

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regard

sports

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Correct article usage

apply

show examples

relaxing entertainment.

For example

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individuals

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sitting in their office for a long time can be lack of energy. If they play ball games like basketball for a

while

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, their bodies will get stretched and

minds

Correct pronoun usage

their minds

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are prone to

obtain

Verb problem

apply

show examples

relax

Replace the word

relaxation

show examples

. Another reason is that many

sports

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are

initially

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created to help

individuals

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Verb problem

apply

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enjoy the outside nature, which means citizens can

gain

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apply

show examples

relax when they conduct those

activities

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. Specifically, skating

activitiy

Correct your spelling

activity

activities

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is ususally

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ususally

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usually

taken up

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show examples

a snow mountain,

thus

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people

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can get a sense of relaxation when they

saw

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see

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the beautiful snow scenery

while

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rushing down to the bottom.

On the other hand

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, I agree with those

individuals

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who consider

sports

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impose many benefits in society rather than only a way to relax.

Firstly

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individuals

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are able to learn

sports

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spirits

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spirit

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from participating

into

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show examples

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

activities

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, which is beneficial for their life development.

For instance

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, swimming could be very hard for beginners, which means

people

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have to spend

many

Replace the quantifier

much

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time

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apply

show examples

learning it.

Consequently

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people

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who participate

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this

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in this

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sport can actually know the importance of persistence, which they may

also

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bring

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

to their daily lives, resulting higher possibility of success.

Secondly

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sports

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activities

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also

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have positive effects on

economy

Add an article

the economy

show examples

This

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is because the

sports

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player

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

to purchase some equipment to protect

themselevs

Correct your spelling

themselves

from danger. Based on that it

also

Linking Words

boost

Change the verb form

boosts

show examples

the local economy. In conclusion, a portion of

people

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believe

relax

Replace the word

relaxation

show examples

is the only aspect of sport because it can relieve

individuals

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' stress and help them to enjoy the outside world.

However

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, I stand with

individuals

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who think they are more than leisure

activities

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due to

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the fact that

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

helps

Correct subject-verb agreement

help

show examples

people

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develop good spirits and

boosts

Correct subject-verb agreement

boost

show examples

the economy.

Submitted by 1356388645 on Fri Jun 28 2024

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general

You did a great job of presenting both views regarding the role of sports, and you provided a clear stance with relevant examples. However, some sentences could benefit from clearer structuring, and a few grammatical errors could be polished.

coherence

Make sure all your sentences flow seamlessly. For example, 'Specifically, skating activity... to the bottom.' could be rephrased for better clarity.

coherence

Try to vary your sentence structures a bit more and avoid repetition. This will make your essay more engaging and easier to read.

task achievement

Although your response was comprehensive, ensure that your examples are as specific as possible to strengthen your points. For instance, providing further details on how sports can boost the economy would provide more depth.

task achievement

Double-check for grammatical accuracy. For example, 'many time' should be changed to 'much time', and 'boost the local economy' should be 'boosts the local economy.'

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are present and well-defined, providing a clear structure to your essay.

task achievement

You provided a thorough discussion of both perspectives and gave a clear personal opinion, showcasing strong task achievement.

task achievement

The examples you provided are relevant and enhance your points.

coherence cohesion

Your essay displays organized ideas and logical progression from one paragraph to the next.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

355 words

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Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mible phones for communication has a negative effect on young people's reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries the widespread use of internet has given people more freedom to work or study at home instead of traveling to work or college. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

Some parents believe that extra private lesson outside school hours, where students work alone with a teach, can help them do better at school. Others disagree. What are the advantages and disadvantages of private tuition? And give your opinion.

It is generally believed that some people are born with certains talents, for instance for sport or music, and other are not. However, it is sometimes claimed tha any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both the views and gie your own opinion.