IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Many people go through life doing work that they hate or have no talent for. Why does this happen? What are the consequences of this situation?

#people #life #work #talent #happen #consequences #situation
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In today’s fast-paced world, many
individuals
Use synonyms
 are employed in sectors they dislike or do not possess the appropriate skills required.
This
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 essay explains that the main reason for
this
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 could be the increasing need for financial stability.
Nevertheless
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, prolonged periods of retaining
such
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 jobs could be detrimental to mental health and quality of
work
Use synonyms
. The primary cause for
people
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 taking up
work
Use synonyms
 in fields they are not skillfully equipped for could be the importance of money in the present day.
This
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 is because funds are required to support one’s family and loved ones.
For instance
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, an engineer would be delighted to be employed by an accounting firm which does not necessitate them to use their knowledge just for the advantage of a better salary.
For
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this
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 reason,
people
Use synonyms
 are increasingly employed in sectors they do not prefer. Despite the monetary advantages, there could be consequences related to doing
work
Use synonyms
 one does not like.
Firstly
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, performing
such
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 jobs could be detrimental to the mental health.
This
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 could be because most
individuals
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 do not look forward to
work
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 and are mentally disturbed with they arrive at their place of employment.
As a result
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, they eventually tend to suffer from mental illnesses
such
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 as depression and anxiety. Another drawback could be the decline in quality of
work
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. The reason for
this
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 could be that
people
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 are not motivated to
work
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.
Additionally
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, the lack of motivation directly correlates towards the lack of innovation in the selected field of
work
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.
Furthermore
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,
this
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 absence of eagerness could reverse the innovations already made in the past and generally make the situation worse.
Therefore
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, it is essential that
people
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 are employed in the sectors they prefer. In conclusion, money has played a pivotal role in the employment of
individuals
Use synonyms
 in jobs they do not like or have the talent for.
However
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, the consequences of deteriorating mental well-being and quality of
work
Use synonyms
 are greater than the improved monetary aspect.
Thus
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,
individuals
Use synonyms
 should assess conditions carefully before making a decision on their
work
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 placement.
Submitted by Writing8 on

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task achievement
You have provided a comprehensive response to the task and covered both parts of the question—reasons for why people work in jobs they dislike and the consequences of this situation.
task achievement
While the ideas are clear and well-detailed, adding more specific examples could bolster your arguments and make them even more convincing.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a logical structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This helps in presenting the arguments in a coherent manner.
coherence cohesion
To improve cohesion further, consider using more varied linking words and phrases to connect your ideas smoothly.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction effectively sets the stage for the essay and gives a clear idea of what will be discussed.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points and offers a final perspective on the issue.
logical structure
Your essay is logically structured and follows a clear progression of ideas, making it easy to follow.
supported main points
The main points are generally well-supported and relevant to the topic, which strengthens your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • dread
  • passion
  • inherent talent
  • fufilling
  • career
  • job
  • fulfilled
  • unhappy
  • unsatisfied
  • work-life balance
  • burnout
  • stress
  • depression
  • anxiety
  • self-esteem
  • emotional well-being
  • potential
  • achieve
  • success
  • personal growth
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