You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words. Write about the following topic: Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?
Recently,
instead
of working for a company or organization, people
prefer to be self-employed. I believe this
phenomenon happened because self-employed
offers great flexibility Correct article usage
the self-employed
although
it also
needs skills
and time
to achieve a
great success. The following paragraph will explain Remove the article
apply
about
the reason why Change preposition
apply
people
choose to be self-employed along with
its disadvantages.
To be a
self-employed means that Correct article usage
apply
people
can get flexibility in the way they work. Nowadays, one of the major factors that increase the trend of self-employed is the advancement of technology such
as Add an article
the internet
internet
. Capitalize word
Internet
This
situation make
it possible for individuals Change the verb form
makes
such
as a
freelance Correct article usage
apply
designer
to find their clients directly from all over the world and connect with them from anywhere. Fix the agreement mistake
designers
Therefore
, people
do not need to commute to their office daily so they can save their money and their time
for their family. Not to mention
that going to the office also
requires much
energy. Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
Moreover
, working in a company also
means that employees should follow the rules such
as paid leave and overwork which is
sometimes very strict and hard to Correct subject-verb agreement
are
be implemented
.
Wrong verb form
implement
However
, to be a
self-employed requires great Correct article usage
apply
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
especially
in the beginning. Add the comma(s)
, especially
People
need to master certain skills
to convince their clients to work with them which is takes
Change the verb form
takes
certain
amount of Change the article
a certain
time
. Furthermore
, after mastering specific skills
, individuals also
need to build their branding and reputations through their great portfolios. However
, building a great image is not really a simple job because it requires much time
, effort, and consistency. Indeed, to get the first customer of
is a pretty challenging job. Sometimes, Change preposition
apply
initially
, people
even offer their skills
for free just to get a chance to build their portfolios. Not to mention
that the competition is extremely challenging and the payment sometimes is too low especially in the initial year so not all people
able
to survive and be successful in certain fields.
In conclusion, individuals nowadays prefer to be self-employed because it offers flexibility but it Add a missing verb
are able
also
requires much effort to survive and success
.Replace the word
succeed
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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Grammar
Ensure grammatical accuracy by refining sentence structures. For example, instead of 'self-employed offers great flexibility,' it should be 'being self-employed offers great flexibility.'
Task Response
While the ideas are clear, aim to enrich the essay with more specific examples or data to support the arguments made. This strengthens your position and makes it more compelling.
Coherence and Cohesion
Avoid minor repetition to maintain reader engagement. For instance, instead of repeating 'requires much time, effort,' you could rephrase it to maintain variety.
Structure
The essay has clear and well-organized paragraphs that enhance readability.
Introduction and Conclusion
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the discussion and sum up the key points sufficiently.
Task Response
The main points are relevant and adequately supported with logical reasoning.