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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The diagrams below show the design for a wave-energy machine and its location. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams below show the design for a wave-energy machine and its location. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The two diagrams show the inner workings of a wave-energy
machine
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 and how it is affected by location. The first diagram shows how the
machine
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 works. It is placed against the direction of the wave, having an opening at the bottom which takes in
water
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 -
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 part is the
water
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 chamber There is
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 a vent which allows
air
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 to flow in from the top. As the
water
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 level rises, an upward flow of
air
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 is created, which allows the
air
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 to circulate throughout the
machine
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 when combined
the
Change preposition
with the

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
 downward
air
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 spins the turbines in the compartment above the
water
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 chamber, which activates the electricity generator. The second diagram shows the options for placing wave-energy machines. If placed near the shore,
installations
Change the noun form
installation

Your sentence appears to use the incorrect form of installations. Consider changing it to singular.

show examples
 costs are reduced at the expense of performance - waves are weaker the closer they are to land. Moving out
further
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 to sea will boost output as waves are larger, but installing the
machine
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 will come at high expenses.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words machine, water, air with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "diagrams" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "wave" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • wave-energy machine
  • kinetic energy
  • electricity generation
  • turbine
  • upper chamber
  • lower chamber
  • air flow
  • installation costs
  • maintenance costs
  • energy output
  • ocean waves
  • wave motion
  • deep water installation
  • shore installation
  • budget constraints
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