IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Nuclear Power is a necessary evil . Despite the potential human and environment consequences of radioactive fallout , nuclear energy is a genuine alternative to non-renewable energy sources like oil and coal, which are quickly running out . In short, the benefits of nuclear power for outweigh the risks of using it. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#power #environment #consequences #fallout #energy #alternative #non-renewable #sources #oil #risks
In today's modern day and age, the human need for energy has increased exponentially. As
such
, researchers have developed a way to harness the energy of radioactive atoms. Despite the risks that come with radioactivity, I
whole-heartedly
Correct your spelling
wholeheartedly
show examples
 believe that nuclear energy will become a superior option to fossil fuels. The first benefit lies in its renewability. Nuclear material provides an endless source of power.
And contrary
Correct word choice
Contrary
show examples
 to popular belief, they actually do not directly hurt the environment. If one were to look at pictures of nuclear plants, it is typical to see white smoke coming from the top of
such
 factories.
This
 is just harmless vapour produced by the heat used to process nuclear material. So unlike fossil fuels, utilizing nuclear power does not create environmental damage - it is nuclear waste which has
potential
Correct article usage
the potential
show examples
 to cause damage -
this
 is an important distinction to keep in mind. The second strength these green atoms have over coal and oil is their efficiency.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Expand your main points: Your essay introduces some good points about the benefits of nuclear power, but they need further development and support with more detailed arguments and examples.
coherence cohesion
Complete your essay: Ensure you provide a clear conclusion that reiterates your stance and summarizes the key points discussed.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical progression: While your essay is fairly cohesive, work on making the transitions between ideas smoother. Linking sentences can help in this regard.
task achievement
Strong introductory paragraph: It sets the context very well and introduces your position clearly.
task achievement
Good use of specific terminology: Words like "radioactive atoms," "nuclear material," and "fossil fuels" show that you understand the topic well.
coherence cohesion
Clarity in expression: Your writing is easy to understand and your points are communicated effectively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Radioactive fallout
  • Non-renewable energy sources
  • Environmental consequences
  • Alternative energy
  • Energy efficiency
  • Long-term impact
  • Fossil fuels
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Technological advances
  • Safety measures
  • Radioactive waste
  • Energy output
  • Climate change
  • Economic costs
  • Job creation
  • Energy demand
  • Renewable energy
  • Energy infrastructure
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!