Some people believe that teaching children at home is the best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the contemporary world, virtual learning has become increasingly prevalent
due to
its convenience.
While
proponents underline the benefits of homeschooling in terms of
children
's upbringing, others believe that school
enrollements
Correct your spelling
enrollments
enrollment
play
more
Add an article
a more
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crucial role in their lives.
Nonetheless
, I firmly assert that it is imperative to pursue studies in schools because they inculcate the potential of conforming to rules and regulations, which can be harnessed in practical fields. On the
on
Correct your spelling
one
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hand, one of the virtues of homeschooling is
flexible
Correct article usage
a flexible
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time
schedule. To elaborate on
this
idea, not only does the lenient timetable allow
students
to relax and meditate in between classes, but
also
provides them enough
time
to grasp concepts and learn them more effectively.
For example
,very often
students
utilize
the
Change the word
their
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spare
time
carrying
Change the verb form
to carry
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out research and
exploring
Wrong verb form
explore
show examples
new topics, which
consequently
, broadens their horizons of learning.
Hence
, it is evident that candidates attending online classes have immense
time
to cultivate their individuality and perform better in classes.
On the other hand
,
traditional
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the traditional
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schooling system instils
sense
Add an article
a sense
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of teamwork and
hones
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hone
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skills
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the skills
show examples
required to tackle
real life
Add a hyphen
real-life
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situations.
In other words
, since
students
interact with several other
students
and participate in collaborative learning, not only do they boost confidence in
children
, but
also
fosters
Correct subject-verb agreement
foster
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them to devise innovative ideas, which, inarguably, is the most demanding skill professionally.
For instance
, owing to the sort of education imparted in classrooms,
students
are able to overcome fears and obstacles more smoothly, and,
therefore
, yield high creativity and productivity in their future careers.
Thus
,
traditional
Correct article usage
the traditional
show examples
educational system
educate
Correct subject-verb agreement
educates
show examples
children
in a way that improves their future career prospects. In conclusion,
although
some parents are more satisfied seeing their
children
studying in front of them, others argue that
knowledge
Correct article usage
the knowledge
show examples
gained from schools is unmatched. In my perspective, classrooms provide a healthy, safe and secure place for learning and growing,
due to
which parents should be enticed to send their
children
to schools, as these learning institutes facilitate
students
to expand their social circle and learn social skills that are essential at every phase of life.
Submitted by hadia.iftikhar126 on

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coherence
Ensure a smooth transition between ideas. Adding more cohesive devices can help achieve this.
task response
While examples provided are relevant, consider adding more specific details to strengthen arguments.
coherence
The introduction and conclusion are well-structured and clearly present the main points of the essay.
task response
The main points in the body paragraphs are well-supported with arguments and examples.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Personalized learning
  • Flexible learning pace
  • Family bonding
  • Negative influences
  • Socialization opportunities
  • Interpersonal skills
  • Extracurricular activities
  • Cultural awareness
  • Qualified teachers
  • Curriculum
  • Homeschooling
  • Traditional schools
  • Diverse group of peers
  • Empathy
  • Peer pressure
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