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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

WRITING TASK 1 You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

WRITING TASK 1 You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#minutes #tourists #caribbean #island #summarise #information #features #comparisons
This
 line chart provides
a key information
Remove the article
key information
a piece of key information
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 about the
number
 of visitors
of
Change preposition
to
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 a Caribbean Island in the period between 2010 and 2017. The units are measured in Millions.
overall
, it is clear from the graph that
total
Change the article
a total
the total
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number
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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visitors had a gradual growth over the years
untill
Correct your spelling
until
 it
hitted
Correct your spelling
hit
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
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 peak in 2017.
In addition
, the amount of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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tourists staying on cruise ships had the lowest
number
 in 2010,
Whereas
 it rocked up to the highest
number
 in 2017.
According to
 what is shown, the trend for
tiurists
Correct your spelling
tourists
 staying on
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 was steady between 2010 and 2011 at 700
thousands
Change to singular
thousand
show examples
.
Then
, it had an increase to 1 million and
half
Change the article
a half
show examples
 in 2013.
Subsequentely
Correct your spelling
Subsequently
, it
was remained
Change to the active voice
remained
has remained
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 stable. After that, in 2015 dropped to one million and
quarter
Correct article usage
a quarter
show examples
 in 2016.
Finally
, it increased to one million and half a gain
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the end of the period.
Submitted by tuma729 on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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