nowadays many people choose to be self-employed rather than to work for a company or organisation. why might this be the case? what could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Self-employement
Correct your spelling
Self-employment
improves the
indivudual's
Correct your spelling
individual's
leadership quality. In
this
generation
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generation,
show examples
self-employed
youngesters
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youngsters
are more than people who
work
for a company.
This
essay will talk about the reason behind
this
situation and the demerits of self-employment.
Firstly
, teenagers choose to be self-employed because they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
find jobs based on their
interest
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interests
show examples
.The education they pursue and the company that the student
work
Correct subject-verb agreement
works
show examples
Change preposition
for is
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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completely irrelevant.
In addition
, the majority of the people are unemployed because the organisations recruit less number of
indivuduals
Correct your spelling
individuals
and provide low
salary
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salaries
show examples
.
For example
, a biology major student working as an employee in a BPO sector
who's
Correct your spelling
whose
show examples
career is completely different from their
work
nature. The student worked in that because they were unemployed and
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
not able to find
job
Add an article
a job
show examples
based on their
graduated
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graduate
show examples
degree.
Secondly
, the demerits of being an
enterpreneur
Correct your spelling
entrepreneur
increases
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increase
show examples
the stress factor
due to
the pressure
that is
built starting from searching
the
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for the
show examples
best
clint
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client
show examples
to setting up a
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
.
On the other hand
, a freelancer
also
undergoes financial loss when they invest a lot of money in developing a business but
does
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do
show examples
not find a profitable return from the investment that they made.
To conclude
, self-
employement
Correct your spelling
employment
can
reduse
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reduce
the rate of unemployed teens in
this
society. I believe that freelancing has its own drawbacks
also
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and also
show examples
does not provide a stable income.
Submitted by insighttribez on

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language
Work on grammatical accuracy and spelling. Pay attention to words like 'self-employment' and 'entrepreneur.'
coherence
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and logical flow. For example, link the paragraph discussing reasons more clearly to the one discussing disadvantages.
task response
Expand on examples with more specific details to strengthen task achievement. For instance, you mentioned a biology major working in a BPO—elaborate on how this affects their motivation or job satisfaction.
task achievement
The essay topic is clearly addressed, and the structure is easy to follow.
task response
You have provided both reasons for the rise in self-employment and its disadvantages, which covers the prompt well.
coherence
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay and provide a good overview of the argument.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-employment
  • freelancing
  • entrepreneurship
  • autonomy
  • financial stability
  • work-life balance
  • financial insecurity
  • lack of support
  • resources
  • long working hours
  • uncertain income
  • job security
What to do next:
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